Sleepwalking can be disturbing, unsettling and downright creepy. Several times as a child, I was jolted awake to find myself in another part of the house, not having a clue how I got there. I would make a beeline back to my bedroom, leap into bed and pull the covers up to my chin. Eyes darting back and forth, I would listen intently to the rest of the family sleeping peacefully, and wonder why I couldn't be that lucky. No ... I had to be the restless one who wandered around the house like the zombies in "Night of the Living Dead."

Once I even found myself sitting on a chair in my brother's room. He woke me up by saying, "What are you DOING? Get out of my room!" I scurried out of there faster than a jackrabbit being chased by a Doberman.

Sleepwalking can also be dangerous. One warm summer evening I abruptly woke up when I slammed into the floor fan in the hallway. Of course it was running at the time, so it sliced my toe and my family was awakened by the crashing of the fan against the wall, in addition to my yelling at the top of my lungs.

Luckily I never wandered outside of the house, much to my parent's relief. The consensus of opinion was that I would grow out of it eventually, and I was eager for that to happen, praying I wasn't one of the "Children of the Corn."

One Christmas Eve, my mother almost had a heart attack when I came strolling into the living room while she and my father were assembling and arranging our presents. She very quickly spun me around and led me back to my bedroom, whispering "You're dreaming ... you're dreaming ..." The next morning I exclaimed, "All the presents look just like they did in my dream!" (I was young okay? very young.)

As an adult, I no longer sleepwalked, but married someone who was a "sleep-eater." This condition can be very strange to live with. One particular morning I was the first person to arrive in the kitchen to find a magazine on the counter. This alone wouldn't be an odd thing to find. It was however, very disconcerting to notice the peanut butter and jelly smeared on the magazine. When I asked my husband, he claimed to remember nothing, but admitted it had happened several times before we met. When I pointed out the peanut butter on his beard, he could only shrug his shoulders and say, "Well ... I hope I use bread next time." Right ... Like there was going to be a next time.

Sleepwalking can be a great excuse for odd behavior, such as:

- - Removing the neighbors' shrubbery and planting it in your yard.
- - Getting tangled up in the neighborhood's tennis court net.
- - Floating in the community pool naked.
- - Waking up in your daughter's backyard playhouse.
- - Waking up in a patio lounge chair, with shelled peanuts all over your chest, and a dozen squirrels asleep nearby.
- - Waking up in a vegetable garden propped up like a scarecrow.

Learn more about this author, Pam From Hell.
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