Very few things in life are as intriguing as watching one's child maneuver through the teen years. Girls begin as wide-eyed children with dolls, hair bands, jungle gyms and bubble gum and
end as young women, ready to conquer the world. Little boys who love "bathroom humor" and
trading cards, baseball and outlandish pranks drive off to universities, bubbling with
impatience in only five short years traipsing through the teen years. It's true - not all teens follow that form, but many do. Parents who are in tune with their children get to have front row seating for the fireworks, frivolity and antics that accompany the magical transition to adulthood. As a mother of five - four sons, and one daughter, I can say with some limited authority that I was witness to, and part of a remarkable metamorphosis. And yes, there are

secrets that help the unwitting parent cope and respond well during those years. What are
they?
First of all, the parent needs to understand that everything - yes, everything needs to
go "on hold" during those short years. New jobs, new businesses, advancements, added job
responsibilities - all these have to take a back seat to the business at hand - raising a
teenager! Games, concerts, friends over, friends visited, shopping trips, most embarrassing moments, girl gossip, smoking and drug temptations, parties, first dates - first
everything for teens - are difficult and fleeting, and need parental supervision and advice.

Second, teens need assurance that they are more important than any job or relationship to
their parents; they need to know that they are pretty, handsome, funny, smart and just
plain interesting and intriguing to be around. The self esteem will never be learned in
some class at school. It is learned by being around parents who value them day in and
day out, hour by hour, who are actually crazy about them!

Lastly, young people, in order to survive the many more dangerous pitfalls out there
today, need to know without any hesitation, that no matter what mistakes they make,
their parents still love them without reservation, and will accept them always.

Does all of this mean that teens have the right to "run over" parents and make all the
decisions? No, just the opposite. With love and acceptance and just being there comes
the responsibility by Dad and Mom both to act as the adults they are.

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