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Grandma's house used to be the place children went to get home-baked cookies and to get their cheeks pinched. Grandma's house was full of family photos, perched precariously on every surface and hung on every funny floral-print wall. Grandma's house was a little dusty, from all the little ceramic pieces grandchildren had given her over the years, that were proudly displayed on mantels and in antique china cabinets made of wood. Grandma's house always had a garden, and Grandpa would always send you home with a bag full of fresh tomatoes. Grandma's house had funny things in it that you didn't know what they were for, and an outdated TV with no cable. Grandma was, to put it nicely, a little plump, and an apron was just part of her everyday wear. Grandpa was taller and more slender, but he had hair sticking out of funny places.

Today, grandma's house is bursting at the seams with people, sometimes with people from 2 to 80 years old living under the same roof. Today, Grandma's house is not much different from home. In fact, many times it is home. Grandma's house is bustling with activity, and no one has time to bake cookies. Grandma's house has a handful of tv's with cable, and at least one computer that everyone, including the grandparents, fight over. Grandpa spends more time emailing with high school pals than he does tending to his tomato plants. He gave up the garden a long time ago because he just didn't have enough time. Grandpa is the one to go to when it's time to learn how to throw a baseball, or pump up a bike tire, or fix a leaky sink. Grandpa knows how to do everything, but woe to the child who backtalks Grandma or Mom. Grandpa is a strict, old school disciplinarian.

Grandma is no longer as big around as she is tall. Gone is her apron and short, somewhat curly gray hair that used to be the signature grandma hairstyle. Today, grandma may be a member of a gym, or at least takes walks around the neighborhood, and uses dye to cover her gray. Grandma helps with homework, takes little ones to doctor's appointments, and knows all the street terms for drugs. Grandma keeps up with all school projects, and teachers may recognize her more readily than Mom. Grandma keeps family photos on her computer now, where she downloaded them from her digital camera. Her walls are painted in earth tones, and styles she's seen on HGTV, and they are no longer a collage of dusty old pictures. Grandma insists on knowing where you're going, who you're going with, and when you'll be back. And failing to perform a task for Grandma equals cleaning baseboards, at least until Mom gets home to bail you out.

The role of grandparents today is that of second-generation parenting. Their days are filled with running taxi for ball games and cheerleading practice, and making sure their grandkids aren't getting in with the wrong crowd. Grandmothers are the menders of missing buttons, and grandfathers are the ones who teach a young boy to open car doors and pull out chairs. Grandmothers teach table manners, and grandfathers help pick out reliable first cars. In many ways, grandparents fill the roles vacated by parents. Grandparents fill the role of fathers who work out of town, or long hours, or who are just plain absent. Grandparents fill the role of mothers who went into the workforce because they finally could, and now stay there because they have to. Today, grandparenting means parenting a new generation of children, but with the experience and wisdom of having already survived it once.

Learn more about this author, Nichole Nash.
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