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I think each one of us is guilty of practicing "The grass is always greener" theory at various times in our lives. It happens most often when we are unhappy about some portion of our existence. The problem with following this practice is that once you arrive on the other side, we often find that it's drought conditions and there's nothing we can do. We aren't allowed to water the grass so we have to live with it and watch it turn brown before our eyes. There's no going back.

The things we aren't dealing with up close and personal always look better than they really are. Let's start with our jobs. Many of us get up each day and head off to a job we despise. What makes us despise our jobs? Maybe it's not challenging or maybe your boss is the epitome of Dilbert'. Of course, there are often those co-workers that get on your nerves like fingernails on a chalkboard. You are always looking for a better opportunity and it seems like working any place would be better than your current situation. Here's the problem. You'll make the change and jump into a new situation with very high hopes of your life turning around and becoming the happiest person on earth. The bad news is that they have brown grass in this company too. It might not be the same issues that make you grind your teeth, but I guarantee there will be something that will make you doubt that you've made the right decision.

Relationships are another area of our lives where we go in search of the greener pastures. You have a significant other who leaves the toilet seat up or leaves her makeup all over the bathroom. I'm not trying to minimize the annoyances that we all live with when sharing our lives with another person. Sometimes there are really big problems that justify not looking for greener grass, but just getting the heck out of the relationship as quickly as possible. However, let's stick with our pet peeves for this discussion. You just know there must be someone else out there who is a much better match for you. For men, it might be the woman who will let you watch football all day on Sunday without paying the price later in the week. So we begin to search for that perfect mate and you see green. It might be lust or maybe its desperation, but you make the change in your life. It won't take long before you realize that this person has faults too. Things that rub you the wrong way are suddenly very big and you are back where you started except it's a different person.

We can apply this way of thinking in almost all areas of our lives. We think we need a new car, house, or pet. There's nothing wrong with trying to make improvements in our lives. I encourage that and always try to do that in my life too. However, I think it's very important to realize that whatever changes you make, there will be obstacles that must be faced and overcome. It would be my hope that the changes bring happiness to your life. Be realistic, expect things to be less than perfect and find ways to work around them. Happiness can be found and you should search for it. Don't give up because I do believe it exists. Just know going in that the grass is not always green.

Learn more about this author, Max White.
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