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I say, "to each his own". But I do believe whether it is a love marriage or an arranged marriage or a semi love cum arranged marriage, what matters is how successful the marriage is. In a lot of Asian countries and in some of the places in the Middle east arranged marriages are preferred over love marriage and the success ratio is really high. So in these places the tradition still continues.

Of course nowadays nobody gets married without meeting their would be partner a few times, getting to know him/her and having a say in the whole matter. Times have changed now and the concept of arranged marriages has undergone a huge upheaval. Nobody forces their offspring to get married to a person against his/her wishes now. It is more like introducing an eligible candidate and then letting the matter be decided by the prospective candidates themselves. Only difference is that the introduction is done by the parents and I see no harm in that. After all every parent wants the best for his/her child and will never settle for anything less. As for the love part, if there is mutual understanding, respect, trust and compatibility between the partners then love only grows and it grows from strength to strength. In an arranged marriage the best thing is all the family members are involved and the kids have so much fun growing up in an atmosphere of so many bonds and ties. They have something to learn from each member and the love they receive is abundant. Plus, the best thing in life is being blessed by your parents and elders and their happiness does bring about a certain amount of good luck, security and positivity to the union.

The whole arranged marriage notion is no longer as primitive or backward as it was some years back and the new modern age concept allows the youngsters to go out on a few dates before deciding if he/she is the one. Sometimes even after the engagement, if it does not work out then the parents break up the alliance.

So it is not all that bad. I mean, don't people agree to go out on blind dates or with people referred to by friends and peers and some even get hitched within a month of knowing each other. If arranged marriages were so evil then it wouldn't be prevalent in so many cultures all over the world. It wouldn't have lasted for centuries and wouldn't still be going strong.

What is most important is that the institution of marriage be taken seriously and the people involved should make a commitment to stick to it for better or worse. And the only people who can make it work are the bride and groom irrespective of how they met or whether the marriage was arranged.

Learn more about this author, Deepa Nanda.
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