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One must own a bag of integrity "seeds" in order to "sow" them. Many will not believe what I am about to write, but every word is true. A few years back, "Time" magazine had a story on its front cover entitled, "How Do Parents Raise Moral Children?" I had my students write essays to answer the question. The majority of my students (ninth through twelfth grade) answered the questions with this introductory statement," Parents can raise moral children if they, themselves, are moral."

What surprised me the most was the fact that my students did not understand the word "moral" until I read it to them from the dictionary. I still received many questions about the question before they would begin writing. They had an hour and a half to write a five paragraph essay about the topic. Many of them enumerated the faults of their parents; many simply wrote what they would do with their children.

Today's parents, according to these teens, do not have any control over their children. Many believe that divorce is the cause; they observe that their parents "sleep around" and "drink themselves under the table." Parents try to tell them what to do and what not to do, but they see the rules as hypocritical. Besides this, parents really don't care enough about them to really push morals upon them. They won't be sowing any seeds if their attitudes don't change.

Most teens do not attend any worship services, nor do they believe that the Bible can determine what is right or wrong. They have not been grounded in any higher power and do not consider their parents' opinions as correct, either. Many of my students said their parents should have demanded that they attend church, but their parents didn't. Many stated that their grandparents were really the ones to whom they looked for any type of moral support or identity.

About half of my students wrote they would be more strict with their children. They would not allow them to have televisions, stereos, or computers in their rooms. They would lock their outside windows at night, and they would not let them use cell phones. They feel that society today is much too loose with rules and regulations. What is threatened, in the way of discipline, is never carried out. They were tired of wishy-washy parents. They also made a statement or two about the power they had over their parents because they could call child welfare on them and lie. I, of course, was shocked that my students were being so harsh on their parents and today's realities.

In conclusion, my eyes were opened as well as my heart. I became a much better teacher after that because I saw the world through their eyes. My rules became tighter and my threats for punishment were carried out. They look to us for guidance and security, and we are not doing our jobs as parents. In order to give our children values, we must show them values; we must believe what we say. We must not lie, nor cheat the government. We need to obey traffic laws; we need to respect our legislature and our elected officials. We need to teach them what is right and wrong in our families, our neighborhoods, our cities, our states, our country, and our world. Then we need to start working on making their world and ours a better place. Perhaps our children will grow up and make us proud of their ability to right wrongs and maintain order in this world. Parents, you need to reap a bag of integrity seeds if you are to help sow these values in your children.

Learn more about this author, Ann Palmieri.
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