by Theo Chester

Created on: February 12, 2008   Last Updated: September 09, 2009

You know who they are. That friend, coworker, or acquaintance who just drains you for all you're worth. It's happened to you more than a few times, for sure. You have coffee or lunch with them, maybe just talk to the them on the phone, and you're left feeling exhausted. Afterwards, a quick glance in the mirror at the reflection of your pale face, will confirm that they have worn you out.

We all know them, we can't avoid them, they are "Energy Vampires." The traditional garlic bulb hanging around your neck, over-sized silver bullet or crucifix, the light of day, nothing will stop the curse of the Energy Vampires. Only you can put an end to the ability they have to make you feel like you haven't slept in days.

There are two distinct types of Energy Vampires (EV). The first type of EV drains you by demanding unlimited amounts of your attention. Even when you're in a group, at a party or alone with them, they want to talk to only you. And they talk non-stop, endlessly telling stories that are less than interesting. They think they are extremely funny and expect you to laugh at every joke they tell. Most of them are not funny, at all. You leave them with your aching facial muscles sore from faking laughter. You've got a pounding headache from listening to them go on, and on, and... Sadly, you missed several valuable networking opportunities and you haven't learned a thing.

The second variety of EV's are on a mission to drain your head of all that you know. They want to empty you of any and all knowledge you have about how to do anything. Sometimes, it's about business, family, recipes, shopping, cars, maybe computers, you name it. They are on a quest to have you inform and entertain them. It always amazes you that somehow you fall into their trap and you spill the beans about everything they wanted to know. When they're done extracting information, you leave feeling squeezed like a toothpaste tube.

Whichever type of EV you're dealing with, you realize that it's a no win situation for you. Once you've identified the Energy Vampire and admitted that you are allowing them to deplete you, it's time to take action. Run. Run like the wind! Surely you've got productive things that you could do with the time that you waste with these folks. Watching TV is more productive than being the victim of an EV. Let's face it, being a victim is passe. You are the only one who can turn the situation to your favor and advantage.

It's not selfish or unkind to want to maintain your energy level and choose what would be best for you to do with your time.
Thereby, avoidance of the draining friends and acquaintances is merely survival. Now, there's no need to be unkind or rude in any way to the suckers. Rather, you should be polite and brief. Learn that it's OK to protect yourself, and your valuable time for your own welfare. Time is a huge commodity, so you have every right to spend it as you see fit.

Keep these relationships superficial and learn to say no. Be assured that NO is a good word, one that you must feel comfortable using for self protection. It's your choice as to how you spend your time, and if you want to invest it into the EV's who drain you, well, get drained. Conversely, if you sincerely want to move forward, to listen and learn, then find new friends, or read a book.

Most importantly, you are the one who can make the choice to protect yourself from the draining of the EV's. Just know, EV's are forever doomed to living their lives by sucking someone else's energy. There are plenty of willing victims out there, you don't have to be one.

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