2 of 29

Write now Article Tools

There are many strategies available to discipline children so how do we know which one works? Is there a perfect strategy for disciplining children? You aren't going to find the perfect discipline strategy by watching Super Nanny or Nanny 911. You aren't going to find the perfect discipline strategy by reading Dr. Spock or The Discipline Book. Finding the perfect discipline strategy is a matter of finding out what works for your child. The form of discipline used will be as different as each child.

We all want to learn how to effectively discipline our children. However, most parents fail to remember that disciplining children is not the same thing as punishing your child. Disciplining is teaching your child right from wrong. The dictionary defines discipline as to train by instruction and practice. Because each child learns differently, you wouldn't discipline each child the same.

As a mother of two children, I have struggled with disciplining my children. Both of my children are very different, what works for my son did not work for my daughter. When my daughter was old enough to learn right from wrong, I disciplined her exactly as I did my son. My son was easy and learned the consequences of his actions without being told a second time. For my son, just telling him what he did wrong, how he can change his behavior to make it right and showing him the rewards for doing things right was enough for him. He was a perfect child, and never gave me any reason to believe that my discipline strategy would not work on his little sister.

However, my daughter was very different. She was and still is very difficult to discipline. As a toddler we tried every method known from time-out to redirecting; nothing worked. As my daughter became a preschooler, disciplining her was even harder. She would laugh while she was in time-out, she would laugh if we took things away from her, she would laugh if we spanked her, and she would laugh if we tried to reason with her. Disciplining my daughter was a source of humor for her; she wasn't afraid of discipline. Even now with my daughter in elementary school, we still struggle with finding the perfect discipline strategy. With our daughter, we are constantly changing our discipline methods, sometimes we have to discipline her and punish her at the same time with some effectiveness.

The bottom line is all children are different, their temperaments are different, the way they learn is different, they develop differently and their discipline strategy should be different. The most important part of discipline is consistency. However, consistency doesn't mean that you have to use the same form of discipline each time your child does something wrong, consistency means acknowledging the wrongdoing and disciplining appropriately. You can't ignore disciplining now matter how frustrating it might become.

Learn more about this author, Laurie Johansen.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.

Add your voice

Know something about The myth of the perfect discipline strategy for children?
We want to hear your view. Write now!