by Moe Zilla

Created on: February 11, 2008

This movie captures a strange slice of 1987. "The Garbage Pail Kids" had started as a line of trading cards meant to parody the wholesome "Cabbage Patch Dolls." Cartoonist Art Spiegelman (who would later win a Pulitzer Prize for his graphic novel "Maus") had dreamed up the idea, and they'd enjoyed phenomenal popularity for over a year. "The Garbage Pail Kids Movie" presented a weird big-screen version of the trading card characters, in a laughably cheap attempt to cash-in.

It was directed and co-authored by 64-year-old Rodney Amateau, a small-time TV director who recreated seven of the characters using latex faces. That's the film's biggest problem, since the puppet creatures aren't particularly interesting to look at, but the movie compensates by giving them lively voices and personalities. The characters are formed from the green goo at the bottom of a garbage pail, which just happens to belong to a kindly grown-up who runs a junk store. "Cap'n Manzini" is played by Broadway legend Anthony Newley, who contributed his charm and intellect to the story. ("Ugliness is not in a mirror. Ugliness is cruelty, meanness of spirit...")

In a way, the movie's weakness is also its strength. The puppets aren't cute - they're tough, aggressive, and genuinely rejected by the "normies" of the world. They're also a little gross - you don't want to know what "Windy Winston" does - but the appeal of the trading cards was always their willingness to be laughably unpleasant. And the movie walks that line carefully - for example, when "Valerie Vomit" demonstrates her defining personality trait by simply regurgitating a deck of playing cards that she'd eaten.

It's even refreshing to see some puppets which are obnoxiously un-cute - like the carnivorous Ali Gator and the street punk Greaser Greg. Messy Tessie repels the boys she so desperately wants to meet. ("Don't shake hands with Messy Tessie," Cap'n Manzini warns.) And rounding out the puppet cast are the bed-wetting "Foul Phil" and the pizza-faced "Nat Nerd."

The hero is a schoolboy who's encouraged by the kids to pursue the girls of his dreams. Tangerine is only interested in the cool clothing designed by the Garbage Pail Kids, and the schoolboy tries to win her affections by bringing her jackets. Her frizzy 80s perm looks even more ridiculous today, and it heightens the one moment where the movie earns some genuine cred. A sentimental movie would've found these two finding romance or living happily ever after. But instead the feisty Garbage Pail Kids make him realize that he's being used, and the schoolboy ultimately rejects Tangerine and returns to his real friends.

"They may not be pretty," the movie's tagline announced, "but they make great friends."

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