41 of 159

Inside

Write now Article Tools

Just think of someone you know: a parent or partner, sibling or child. Would it really matter what they looked like, or would you still love them anyway?

To be honest I was initially attracted to the lady I married because of her physical appearance, but it only became true love when I'd spent some time with her and found out more about her as a person. And it was this part of her which really makes her special.

It's her patience, her understanding and her gentle kindness which makes Helen who she is, not how tall she is, what size she is or how much make-up she puts on to highlight her beautiful blue eyes. If she suffered from an illness or following an accident it wouldn't change her as a person, just as a child born with a crippling disease doesn't make them bad, because damaging the vehicle doesn't damage the goods

I'm not saying that physical beauty doesn't come into it, because that's how most of us are initially attracted to each other, but physical beauty changes as we get older; it's our personality which stays with us forever.

The question reminds me of Lionel Ritchie's video for his 1984 hit Hello, in which a blind female art student makes a sculpture of his head. She may have been able to recreate his physical features, but being blind she would've relied more on his personality as any relationship developed.

A relationship based purely on looks is unlikely to last because as we age, our physique deteriorates as much as we might try to conceal it. And can we really be sure that the physical attraction we immediately feel isn't hidden by over-zealous make-up or cosmetic surgery? In which case it's a false beauty to begin with.

If a man has numerous affairs, he may be physically good-looking but is he trustworthy, reliable and honest? And what's more important in a relationship?

I know that as I get older, what looks I still have, which believe me aren't up to much in the first place, will disappear. I'm losing my hair and have recently heard that aging men naturally experience a growing of their nose and ears it looks like a great old age! But if I treat people well and bring my children up to be good people, am nice and polite and show good manners, isn't that more important?

And I know that whatever else I do in life I'd rather be known as a nice ugly man than a good looking pig. And I think it would say more about those people describing me as well.

Learn more about this author, Ben Hughes.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.

Add your voice

Know something about Is real beauty on the outside or the inside??
We want to hear your view. Write now!