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Satire

Satire: Politics

To an immigrant the quote, "The Streets Are Paved With Gold" is what they want to believe. If they choose to believe this impossible tale, they can find all the "Fools Gold" they want. Just think, everyone in The United States is as rich as they want to be. The poor people you see on your TV's are only there to keep you from coming here, they are actors.

Visas, you don't need no stinking visas! Come on down! We want to make you rich, like we are. We the people want you to be one of us. We are building a "NEW AMERICA", that you can be a part of. Do you have good health-care? If not, you can get it in the New America we are building. You say you don't have auto insurance because you don't have a car! We in The United States can help you get both. Trust us, we know you deserve these items, and more.

The "American Dream" has been reborn, for new immigrants. Do you have a reason you should not be a part of it? We here in this great land of immigrants, want you to be our brothers and sisters. If you have been told that race, or religion play a part in joining us, you have been told wrong about us. Worship who you want, where you want and when you want. This is part of The "OLD AMERICA" that is still tolerated.

Do you have a trade, or are you a professional? These things don't matter. We will train you to become whatever you want to be. So you can't read, or write! We are a country of equal opportunity that will still send you a check every week. Even if you do not use it to go to school, we will still send it. We believe in letting you make up your own mind.

Is there another country like us? No chance! After all, is it not better to give than to receive? We are a country of givers, we have so much to give. You are from another country, and can't have as much as we do. It is time for you to receive! Is that a difficult thing for you to do?

You may ask how we Americans can do this? Hey, that's not your problem! While you pack your bags, we will raise taxes on every citizen in our country. We all want you to come here, and enjoy what we can give you. Lets just say; "a deal is a deal!" Not to worry, we will keep up our part. Here's the best part. After you become affluent Americans, you can become a part of the "NEW AMERICA." You can pay taxes that are taller than yourself, and help bring more immigrants to America. See how easy it is! Don't wait, visas are getting low in stock. Who am I kidding, be an illegal alien!

Learn more about this author, Harvey Stelman.
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