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My nickname from childhood is "ladybug," derived from an song popular when I was born. My sister's nickname wasn't as cute. She was called "pickle," and it I wasn't very old when I discovered why. Later, she earned another nickname: Mrs. Cosell. We called her that because she spent so much of her time criticizing others, complaining, and generally being unhappy that it just seemed to fit.

No child, even in the same household, is exactly alike, except perhaps twins. Even twins usually have a small trait or two that sets them apart from one another. In my case, I don't know if I grew up to fit my nickname, or if the nickname simply suited me. Hers certainly suited her, though.

I was typically happy and I'm told, very sweet. Pickle, on the other hand, seemed so well fitted to her nickname, it didn't take a stranger long to understand why she was called this. Her disposition was sour, her outlook dim, and her attitude very negative. Rare was the day that she had something good to say.

We usually have to put up with a family member's disposition, but how does one deal with the negativity in casual settings or in the workplace? Negative people have the uncanny ability to spoil just about any social or business setting, whether a Christmas party or a brain-storming meeting. Working with negative people can have a direct and expensive impact on our work production.

Negativity feeds upon itself, and the person is often non-specific about their negative thoughts or words, usually finding it easy to just group everything into the "negativity basket." Most people do not like change, its just human nature. The negative person hates change even more. When you find a person being negative, there are a few options to choose from: You can listen to them, allowing them to use you as their "soundboard," and let them bring you down. This may work short-term if you care enough about the person to allow them to drag you through their mud. You can counteract their negativity with your positive outlook. An example of this is if they are making negative, pessimistic statements, such as complaining about their life and the lack of all things good in it, you can remind them that they are actually quite well off, because for one thing, they are breathing and able to tell you about it!

Using body language is one way to provide subtle clues that you don't want to listen to their negative words. Don't join in on the behavior or negative talk. Use raised eyebrows, a dropped jaw, a look of surprise

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