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Are parents who scream out of control.

In a word, yes. Young children learn all of their behavior from their parents so if you scream and shout at your children you must expect them to scream and shout back at you. You must always strive to set your children the example you want them to follow.

It is important that your child knows they are being punished because you love them and want them to grow in nice human beings, not just because they have annoyed you.

This seems very obvious to me as I sit calmly at my computer, however in the heat of the moment I can understand how your child can drive you to screaming point. The trick is to take time out to calm yourself down before it gets to that point.

There are plenty of ways to show displeasure to your children without resorting to yelling at them. Obviously it will depend on your child's age and personality as to which punishment you choose, but there are plenty of alternatives to shouting.

FOR YOUNGER CHILDREN.
One of the best punishments I have found for younger children is 'the naughty chair'. It doesn't necessarily have to be a chair, it can be a mat, a step on the stairs, anywhere really. The whole point is to tell your child about the naughty chair before they are naughty. Explain to them that you don't want to have to send them there but if they are bad they will have to sit there for one minute for each year of their life.

So if your child does something that you think deserves a visit to the naughty chair, tell them why they are being sent there. Next carry them to the chair and tell them they have to sit there until you come and get them. You should leave them there for one minute for each year of their life. Once the time is up, calmly go to your child and remind them why they are there, then ask them to say sorry. If they apologize give them a big hug and carry on with your day.

OLDER CHILDREN.
Grounding works well, but don't just let them sit in the house watching television. Set them a list of chores. They will soon want to earn back their freedom!

Also confiscating their mobile phone, or with holding the play station or computer. There are many ways to reprimand your child, and shouting should never come into it.

The worst thing about being a parent is that everybody has an opinion on how you raise your child but there are no manuals that come with a baby. All parents have to learn as they go. It can be very scary, not to mention frustrating.

I am a mother of three children ranging in ages from twenty-one to ten. When I had my first child I had this romantic image of motherhood. I thought we would be best friends and never fight. How wrong I was!

I have since learned to ignore the small things that my children do and concentrate on the bigger issues. It is vital to show a united front to your children so you need to speak to your partner and decide on your parenting style(preferably before you have any children).

I have found over the years that the best way to get your children to punish your child's 'bad' behavior is to with hold the thing they like best. You must tailor the punishment to fit the crime and it is no use thinking that the same punishment will work for all of your children. For instance, my son loves the computer and the play station, so if he needs to be reprimanded he will be banned from the computer for a certain number of days. However my daughter wouldn't care if she never sat at the computer so I have to find a suitable punishment that will affect her as much as it does my son.

Learn more about this author, Jo.H.
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