The Power of Energy Induced Insanity
I'm a natural born procrastinator, I even decided to hang out in my mothers womb an extra week until it was absolutely neccisary for me to come out. I've tried not to procrastinate but being born with ADHD and a slight case of complusion if I started something early i would just end up scratching it and coming up with something else the night before. I liked to stay up nights before I had a big paper, project or test due, I think it was because I liked to peace and quiet I got from studying when everyone was asleep, doing things without someone putting pressure on me or watching my every move. Staying awake I could be compulsive and out there without judgment but late nights start to take a toll on you. I had a unfair advantage over most because I have ADHD and I am prescribed Adderal, which is pretty much crack in a pill. Adderal gives you that boost that you need but after awhile you need to feel more so I turned to Energy drinks to help take off the edge I'd feel after the mid afternoon crash from my sleepless high. My choice of energy drink was either Red Bull or Monster. During test blocks I would be on a diet of Adderal, red bull, exercise, no sleep and the comfort of my books. But slowly and surely I started to lose my mind, not the lose my mind and pull a Britney and shave my head sense but in a way that I thought that everything i was doing was logical. In my mind I needed these things, they helped me acheive this feeling of power and superiority I felt over those who were too week so stay awake and take charge like I was. I was so completely out of my mind that I didn't realize how truly insane this all was, I didn't realize that some of the things I was doing really was kind of insane. I hit bottom when one day I was on the floor bawling because the pink color of my bathroom didn't much the new shower curtains my mom just bought. After that quite insane moment I decided it was time to quit, to regain my sanity. I through out the energy drinks and now only take the amount of Adderal that is prescribed to me and I'm working on trying to space out the things I have to get done by using time managment. It was a hard lesson to learn but I finally realized that you cant do everything not even will all the artifical help in the world.
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