by Susan Hicks

Created on: February 04, 2008

Deception and Forgiveness

When we are deceived in one way or another, we feel betrayed. Be it in the form of cheating, misleading or stealing, our first thoughts or feelings may be anger followed by hate and revenge. Embarrassment, heartache, and just plain feeling like a fool can take you by surprise and the loss of control can put you in a tailspin. You may find yourself asking these questions. How could I have put myself in this type of situation? What could I have done to prevent it? The fact is, probably you could have done nothing to prevent such a thing from happening. However, developing an understanding of the situation that lead to feelings of anger, hate and revenge and learning to forgive and let go of hurt will give you the confidence to overcome.

The destructive nature of anger, hate and revenge can dominate everyday life, and the impact of these negative emotions can become a part of a negative cycle. Harboring acts of anger, pain and resentment can increase chronic stress leading to high blood pressure, heart attack and stroke.

Forgiveness is the counter act of all betrayal. Forgiveness serves not only to exchange negative energy for positive, but also allows positive emotions to come in. This is not to say you must forget the situation, which caused destructive emotions to surface. Remembering the situation can be most beneficial on the journey towards forgiveness.

Benefits of forgiveness include the following;
Increase of self-control
Increase of self-esteem
Release of anxiety
Lowering blood pressure

Letting go of expectations in others releases feelings of anger and resentment leading to a more positive outlook.

First, forgive yourself for harboring negative thoughts or ill will towards another for acts of betrayal. Forgiveness is a gift that lasts a lifetime. By focusing your energy on family, friends and community, you can find contentment and peace.

Whether or not deception is ever forgivable is up to you. You can choose to allow the event or circumstance to rule your life or you can choose to rid yourself of all negative emotions and move on.

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