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Friendship Drama & Issues

How to handle stalkers

Stalkers come in many forms.
Some are strangers, some are close friends - or even lovers.
Some friendly, some are vicious.
While one stalker may work around the clock openly stalking you, some may go at a slower pace and do it in a less obvious manner.
Either way, there is one common factor - you don't want them in your life.

How do you handle a stalker?

First and foremost, obtain a restraining order! This is your toughest defense against a person that is invading your life in an unwanted manner. Stalking is illegal, and your local law enforcement will be able to help put an end to it.

A restraining order (or PPO - personal protection order), may not always be an immediate solution to stop your stalker. However, it is the safest way to deal with them. The following story is a prime example of someone who tried many different ways to make her stalker go away, before finally resorting to a PPO.

Mary met Tom in the local pub, where she bartended five nights a week. Tom was witty, had a great sense of humor, and tipped well. At times, he was the only customer that sat at the bar. When business was slow, Mary filled her time chatting it up with Tom, exchanging stories of life experiences. Both were about the same age, in their mid twenties. They both enjoyed painting, and would talk for hours about different pieces that they had done. All the while, Tom was chugging back bottle after bottle of beer. By the nights end, he would have consumed 15 or more beers, but always seemed remarkably sober. Each night ended the same, with Tom giving Mary a tip of around fifty dollars, and heading outdoors to a cab that awaited him. Since the night Mary first met Tom, his visits to the pub became more frequent. After three weeks, he started coming in on each one of her shifts. He started tipping her upwards of two hundred dollars a night. Mary welcomed the extra cash flow, as she was a struggling full time student with a full time job.

Over the next two months, Toms behavior changed quite a bit. Not only did the tipping continue to increase, but he started to bring Mary gifts. One day, Mary mentioned to Tom that she was having a lot of back pain. The next day, he presented her with a gift certificate - good for a one hour massage at a local spa. Another time, shortly after her own had broke, her gave her a brand new digital camera. That day, the pub was a little busier than normal. With about seven other patrons sitting at the bar, she


Below are the top articles rated and ranked by Helium members on:

How to handle stalkers

  • 1 of 5

    by Lynne Marie

    Stalkers come in many forms. Some are strangers, some are close friends - or even lovers. Some friendly, some are v... read more

  • 2 of 5

    by Michelle Powers

    As a victim's advocate I work with a lot of women who have been or are being stalked. Stalkers are smart, they usual... read more

  • by Melinda Simmons

    Hey everyone. I'm 23 years old and i have 2 beautiful children. i meet my baby father in a place i had no busines... read more

  • 4 of 5

    by Tami Port

    When most of us think "stalking," it's the well-publicized incidents involving celebrities that come to mind, but you... read more

  • 5 of 5

    by Lauren Keiser

    I'm a young twenty-something and in my quest to be as kind as possible; I have been proned to be the victim of obsess... read more

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