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Poetry: Dragon humor

by Michelle Strozykowski

Created on: January 29, 2008

The Dragon Who Mooed

In a far away land called Alacazoo
lived the friendliest dragon who ever did moo.
"Hey! Dragons don't moo!" I hear you declare,
"They snort and they roar and shoot flames everywhere."

But Dante the dragon, for that was his name,
was different you see because he had no flames.
No matter how hard he blew and he blew
all that came out of his snout was a moo.

This will never do, Dante thought to himself.
It's bad for my image and bad for my health.
I'll check with my doctor, see if he can cure it.
This terrible mooing, I cannot endure it.

So off to the doctor of dragons he flew
to find out if there was a cure for his moo.
He told his sad story, with many a sniffle.
The doctor just laughed saying "Bah, this is piffle.
Although there were dragons who breathed flames of fire,
they're no longer here, they have all expired.

The trouble with breathing great torrents of flames
was dragons got caught up in all kinds of games.
Guarding princesses in ivory towers
and fighting bold knights for hours upon hours.
Eventually, dragons who breathed fire all ceased
and left in their wake a new kind of beast.

Dragons who moo and miaow and woof woof.
Dragons who aren't seen as quite tough enough
for knights to be bothered to fight them with swords,
and prove to princesses and gathering hordes,
that they are the bravest most valiant heroes.
(Fighting dragons that moo makes them feel more like zeroes.)

So don't be alarmed by your mooing my friend,
don't seek ways to fix it, there's nothing to mend.
And all I can say is if you're still upset,
the best thing to do is to purchase a pet."

A pet is the thing for a dragon who moos.
A pet to look after, but which one to choose?
A pet who will lift you up out of the blues!

So Dante set off with a new sense of purpose
to search for a pet, first stop was the circus,
and almost immediately, locked in a cage,
Dante discovered a monkey named Sage.
"Moo" said the dragon
"Hee Haw" said the monkey
"You sound like a cow..."
"and you sound like a donkey!"
Dante and Sage knew from that very second
that they should be friends, and a brand new life beckoned.

Dante unlocked the big bolt on the cage,
and hurried away, quick as lightening, with Sage.

The ringmaster chased them and shouted "Oi, you!"
But Dante just turned round and hollered out

"MOOOOoooooooo!"

The ringmaster started to tremble with fright,
as Dante the dragon began to take flight.
With Sage on his back, he soared in the air,
and off they both flew to goodness knows where,
and lived there for ever and ever and ever.
Now don't you think that was incredibly clever?

Learn more about this author, Michelle Strozykowski.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.

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