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It goes without saying that good listening skills are key to effective communication, without which we cannot form effective work relationships. Communication is a two way process, talking and listening. If two were talking at the same time and no one was listening to the other, then definitely a breakdown in communication will occur, and thus a breakdown in relationships and work performance will suffer.

From personal experience having worked in a Human Resources Department in an organisation tht employed over 250 staff members, my listening skills and interpersonal skills greatly assisted me in satisfactorily overcoming any such sensitive and complicated issues that arose to the benefit of both parties - the staff members concerned and the organization as a whole. In any given situation, I first listened to them and asked them questions that would allow them to express themselves, express their feelings and put forward their views. But I believe what actually did help me is that - I really cared - and that's what is really important that we do not fake it, but that we really and truly care for the other person, so as to experience what they would experience emotionally and predict how they would react and know how to best deal with the situation - as though you were them.

In possessing and practicing good listening skills, you win people over, you build a good rapport with them and you also obtain the information you need from them as it necessitate in any work situation. Being a good listener will benefit you in many ways in your work relationships, as it will benefit you in the performance of your work in itself.

When you pay attention to what the other person has to say, you show them that:

1) You are interested in what they have to say and therefore you show interest on them as individuals
2) You respect them
3) You understand them
2) You are considerate
3) You are supportive
3) You take them seriously
4) You care

Thus, in actively listening, you have now established trust with the other person, and now if you require gathering any information, you know what questions to ask to obtain that information. Therefore your effective listening skills have benefited you in:

1) Making a new friend' in any particular situation (you have created a healthy work relationship and an atmosphere of easement)
2) Being able to ask the right questions to obtain the right information
3) Receiving positive feedback
4) Clearly understanding what is being said
5) Clearly understanding the situation
6) Clearly understanding instructions

Actively listening does not only involving 'hearing' the other person, but the way we conduct ourselves towards the other person will determine whether we are actively listening or just pretending to be listening. We should effectively use our facial expressions, body language and tone of voice in such a fashion that it would make the other person perceive that we are really listening.

Therefore, one cannot establish effective work relationships (or indeed any other relationship) without first developing good listening skills. Albeit, let us bear in mind that as we would like others to listen to us and understand us when we are talking, others also would like us to listen to them when they are talking to us!

Learn more about this author, Nadia Benjamin.
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