by Moe Zilla

Created on: January 29, 2008

Molly Ringwald had already earned the hearts of teenagers in the mid-80s as the spunky redheaded star of "Pretty in Pink," "Sixteen Candles," and "The Breakfast Club." Unfortunately, the charm of these movies came from the tone established by director John Hughes, and by the late 80s he'd moved on to directing adult comedies. In "The Pick-Up Artist," Ringwald is left in the hands of James Toback, an inexperienced writer-turned-director whose biggest claim to fame was a screenplay and movie based on his life as a compulsive gambler.

Molly's sweet, sensible persona had given a warm innocence to her earlier movies, but in this one she's teamed up with the abrasive Robert Downey Jr. He plays a talkative young womanizer, and it's obvious his insincerity holds no attraction for Ringwald's character. In fact, it's a little too obvious. Critics pointed out there was no "chemistry" between the two actors whatsoever, and it strains credulity to think that Downey could eventually change her heart, just by being both obnoxious and persistent.

Dennis Hopper plays her father, offering an even stranger casting choice. This was less than a year after his performance as the violent, nitrous-huffing sadist in David Lynch's "Blue Velvet." Hopper was earning his way back into the good graces of Hollywood after a decade filled with stories about Hopper's erratic behavior and drug use, and he would eventually win an Oscar the next year for his part in "Hoosiers." In "The Pick-Up Artist," he plays the alcoholic father with gambling debts who ends up indebted to the mob.

It's up to his plucky young daughter to save him, which she attempts to do by gambling in Atlantic City. At this point it becomes obvious that the script was written by a compulsive gambler, since her solution is: to sell Downey's van, and gamble again. This might send the wrong message to impressionable teenagers watching the film, though the whole movie is such a joyless exercise, it's unlikely to make much of an impression.

Their mob-enhanced ordeal has brought these two youngsters closer together, but the movie never really delivers a warm moment. The jokes aren't funny, and the scenes don't really develop the characters. (Except the poignant scenes of Ringwald confronting her father, a genuinely tender man who's lost in his addiction.) It seems like the only reason the two young stars get together is because it's written in the script. Any viewer can immediately see that it will never work out.

She's sweet and sensible, and he's just loud.

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