I think it's wrong to assume that schools will offer the best sex ed advice to your teens. Taking a proactive approach at home is the best bet. Only a parent truly knows the responsibility level their child has reached, and therefore are the best educators when it comes to a subject as touchy as teen aged sex.

Along those same lines, it is the parents responsibility, ultimately, to guide our children in the best direction, especially where sex is concerned.

To bury your head in the sand and pretend that just because you've instilled a good sense of morals and ethics into you child means that sex won't be an option, leaves you wide open for a great deal of disappointment.

The only way to combat and be appropriately prepared for sex among teen agers is to understand the mind set. Teen agers are going to have sex no matter how they were raised, no matter what they've been taught and sometimes in spite of religious beliefs. Once you've set yourself in that mindset, sex talks with your child will flow freely and education can begin and end within the home.

It is no the school's responsibility to teach sex ed, nor is their responsibility to encourage or deny sexual activity among our teen agers. The offering of sex ed within the school systems is simply an addition to what the parent should be teaching at home to begin with. It is an alternative, nothing more, nothing less. Ultimately, it is up to the parents to decide when and how the conversations should occur and how they play out. The school systems can not be held responsible for this type of knowledge and understanding.

The more open you are with your children, the better the communications will be. The less your expectations of your child, and the more understanding you offer rather than judgments and harsh reprimands, the more your teen ager will face these issues with a clear train of though and their own ideals regarding matters such as this will match your own.

One can not condemn the child who seeks out a sexual relationship before their age determines their readiness. The schools systems do not have a right to encourage sexual relationships among teenagers, and yet, they also should not be put in the position of being your child's only education where sexual matters are concerned.

Learn more about this author, Mary Martir.
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