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I travel now leads me further and further down the path of contemplation, reflection, education, and intuition and has thus far guided me kindly. I bow humbly to it everyday even when it feels like I might not understand whatever it is I am intended to.

I ask for a divorce in May 2005, I am denied this request (I never knew the other person could say "no-I don't want a divorce") and I would spend all of that year exploring the big questions. Who am I? And what of who I had become did I want to discard and what did I want to keep?

I accepted his rejection to my request of separation and proposed he use the year to assess me (and himself) and seriously see if I was who he really wanted. Based on nothing more than whom I was becoming and not so much on who he thought I had always been (though some things were innately me that is another story for another time). We were both emotional infants each in our own way and ultimately in May 2006 we move into separate homes and in August 2007 I filed for divorce.

What "I" thought would be best for him, was based on books "I" had read (Science Sense & Soul, Casey Blood, Ph.D, Wisdom of the Ages, Wayne Dyer, Somewhere between Double Trouble & Infinity, Julie Chai, The self Aware Universe, Amit Goswami, Ph.D.), and what "I" deemed as a "healthy and peaceful human experience" was based on what "I" had begun to practice (aspects of Buddhism)as workable in my reality. With a child in the midst of our differing opinions, and seeing the potential for a not so good divorce I had to step back to aggressively seek and dissect my own ego to ensure I was making the very best decisions for us all.

After trying to cram literature down his throat, in hopes that he would "see the light", I finally gave up and decided maybe I could learn to meditate my irritation about his lack of drive right out of my system and eventually not even care that he was doing so many things that I thought were "fruitless", "dead end", "superficial" (the list of my accusations about his life choices could be an entirely separate essay all together as well) and over all "counter productive".

The Transformation

"It's an hour long meditation, you wanna try it?" suggested a friend (another on the path the emotional freedom).
"Sure, let's go!" I say with excitement What's an hour?' I thought. I had become intensely skilled at sitting in silence during the last year of my marriage so this seemed like it would be a breeze for me.

We entered and they spritzed our palms with

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