5 of 55

Write now Article Tools

Parenting never gets any easier!

We spent a lot of time at the library when Peter and Beth were small. I don't do outdoors very long when there are 12" of snow on the ground and it's 9 degrees below zero; however, the house soon begins to feel confining. Our library offered a variety of services - inside a heated building!

One day, I bundled Beth (just learning to walk) into her snowsuit, helped Peter pull on his boots, and drove us to the library. Beth sat peacefully on my lap, banging puzzle pieces on the table while Peter put the puzzles together. When Beth began keeping the pieces Peter needed, I chose to change activities.

I put Beth on the floor with a stray puzzle piece or two and helped Peter find his 15 to 25 books. Since Beth still seemed content, I asked Peter to sit at a table and look at books while I chose books of my own. Suddenly, Beth decided she wanted to run around, Peter decided he wanted to chase Beth, and I decided it was time to go!

Naturally, there was a line at the check-out desk a long line. (Normally, three people do not constitute a long line, but this situation was desperate.) Since Peter and Beth had behaved so well for so long, they decided they deserved to misbehave equally as well. Trying to hold Beth, the diaper bag, my purse and Peter's 18 books became a real struggle as Beth squirmed to get free and Peter skulked among the tables full of adult readers.

When I finally reached the check-out desk, Beth wriggled out of my arms, causing me to drop three of Peter's books. Peter took advantage of the distraction to disappear behind one of the bookshelves.

Taking a deep breath, I quietly placed the rest of the books on the counter, corralled Beth between my legs and picked up the books that had fallen. I could only pray that, while out of sight, Peter wouldn't rearrange the shelves too drastically. Looking at the librarian, I muttered something about wishing murder were not a capital crime. The librarian grinned. "No jury of your peers would ever convict you," she whispered.

Fast forward 14 years to Picture Day at the high school. The night before, Beth and I completed the appropriate paper work. She dutifully chose the background she preferred for the picture while I tried to remember how many people we sent pictures to so we could order enough wallet-size prints. I wrote a check and carefully placed the envelope in plain sight on the breakfast table. The next morning, as Beth headed for the door, I asked if she had her picture money. She nodded. (Verbal communication with a teenager in the mornings is non-existent.) I said goodbye and continued exercising - until the phone rang. I heard a very contrite Beth admit to forgetting her picture money and asking me to bring it to school.

I was sweaty. My clothes smelled atrociously. I hadn't brushed my teeth. I was angry, and Beth wanted me to appear in public? Not knowing what time she needed the money, I hurriedly pulled on a pair of Tom's sweat pants and an old sweatshirt and drove to the high school.

Walking across the parking lot, I passed the police officer assigned to the school. I asked if I would get in big trouble if I shot Beth for forgetting her picture money. He shook his head. "It's Tuesday," he said. "Strangle her."

No, it just never gets any easier!

Learn more about this author, Linda Marsh.
Click here to send this author comments or questions.

Add your voice

Know something about Who said parenting was easy??
We want to hear your view. Write now!