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Last fall, my best friend and I were discussing a series that was being shown on PBS. The series is called "The War" based on the book written by Gregory Ward, produced, and directed by Ken Burns and Lynn Novac. He raved about the series, but complained that he wasn't able to watch all of the installments as they were spread out over a period of time.

During the next few weeks there were many articles about the series in magazines, newspapers and on line. I noticed that the complete set that had been shown was available for purchase on DVD's. The ever looming question as to what to give my hard to buy for friend became obvious. This was a gift that I knew he would never buy for himself. So, early in December, I went to Border's and bought the DVD set of "The War" to give him for Christmas.

On Christmas eve, my friend and I exchanged gifts. When he opened my gift to him and saw what it was, he was thrilled! "How did I know that this was exactly what he wanted?" he asked. Easy. I had been listening to him. This is the same friend who was with me at an arts festival when I stopped dead in my tracks as I came across a painting that I loved. Little did i know, until my birthday, months later, that he had returned to the artist's booth the next day and purchased the piece to give me for my birthday.

When I unwrapped my birthday gift, I was stunned, amazed and thrilled all at once, that he had been so thoughtful and aware of my love for the painting. That was many years ago, yet I'll always have that memory of what he did to present me with a special gift, one that he knew that I would certainly want to have and a memory that I would always adore. Every day I would look at the painting and think about my friend, and know that I was fortunate to have this person in my life.

Presenting a gift to someone when you really care about the recipient is no easy task. For sure, we are always stymied as to what we can give to that special person in our lives. How often do we say that we can't think of a thing that that close relative, and best friend would need? First we need to lose the word "need" when we think about gifting.

After all, a gift is something that should come from the heart of the giver. Listening would be the first and foremost gift that we have to give, not solely to our best friends, but in all situations of our lives. Listening gives us the edge, if we really hear what someone is saying.

The significance of a gift can be trivial, like what I was given for Christmas by my 6 year old niece. Her parents have her use her own money that comes from chores and allowance to buy personal gifts. Although I won't be wearing it, the novelty ring with the blue glass stone is always on my night stand. It makes me smile and I can feel her love just by looking at the ring she bought with her money for me.

The significance of a gift, no matter the cost or its potential usefulness, is what matters. Should you buy a book for that special person, always write a message on the leaf of the book. I can't imagine how a book could be given as a gift without a note about the significance that you want the book to convey to the recipient or the intent with which it was given.

The biggest gift we can receive is the friendship and loyalty that we have in a close, loving friendship. The best gift we can give in return is, of course, our loyalty and friendship as well. How amazing it is, all of the gifts we can think of to give to that special person, when we listen to what they say.

Learn more about this author, Theo Chester.
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