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Although we have not even been married for three years yet, there has been resentment in our marriage. We had been living together for two years before we got married and so much had been placed on our relationship that things just started spiraling out of control. He had promised to give me and my two children a wonderful life. He made the money that would give us that life. Then the company he worked for went out of business. He was unable to find another job making that kind of money. We struggled financially and were barely making ends meet. I started resenting him for us having to live barely making it and then I found out I was pregnant. A little over a year into our relationship and here we were resenting each other to the point that our love was turning to hatred.

With the baby on the way, money was getting even tighter. I started resenting him for not providing well enough for us. He was resenting me for being pregnant. By time our son was born we really started to hate each other. Then our son came and everything else seemed so minor that we really thought we were gonna make it after all. Just looking at that brand new baby seemed to be what we needed to pull it together. Or so we had thought.

It was only a matter of time before the real world stepped back in and started us on our downward spiral again. The problem was that even though we connected at the hospital over the birth of our son we had still neglected to address the real issues. It would be awhile before we had the guts to face what was really happening.

It would come as a hard blow the night we finally laid it all to rest. That night was filled with a lot of anger and rage as we screamed insults and laid blame on each other. I think we threw some stuff at each other in the process as well. In the end I think that was the best thing for us. Once we finally screamed it all out what we were feeling without worrying about hurting the other person's feeling we were able to move past it all.

We had kept it all inside ourselves' without ever letting it all. When it is kept in it just festers and the resentment just grows. For us it was hard to just talk about what we were feeling because we did not want to hurt the other person and yet that is exactly what we did by holding it in. We would go days without really speaking and when we did everything we said was laced with hatred. It took blowing up and not caring what the other felt to finally just get it all out.

Now we have a weekly to bi-weekly scream session to just get it all out. A few hours after we hold our little scream session we will sit and talk about it then in a more calm and rationale manner. While we still have our problems, no one can say we are not happy and in love.

Learn more about this author, Antoinette Mcgowan.
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