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The single most important thing to pack when you travel overseas is your sense of humor. In fact, keep it in your hand luggage - because you may well need it while you are still on the plane.
Minor annoyances, if you don't let them get under your skin, can often be lemons which you turn into lemonade. Even when you don't succeed in getting them fixed, in the end they may result into happy memories which will provide you with a smile in later years.
One time, when I boarded an Alitalia flight, I found myself seated next to a rather large gentleman - so large, in fact, that he could not fit in his seat and lifted the armrest so that he could take up part of mine as well.
I asked the flight attendent if there was another seat that I could take and he assured me that there was not an empty one on the entire plane. My mistake, I soon realized, was that I asked in English. A few minutes later when this same attendent was passing out newspapers, I asked for Corriere della Sera. When he saw that I could speak Italian he told me to follow him - to a seat in the almost-empty First Class cabin.
On another occasion, I was in the northern Italy city of Como with my Milanese girlfriend when I spotted a montone - a type of parka. Heavy, full length, and hooded, it was made from very supple leather lined with wool. Although I fell in love with it, it was clearly out of my league - it carried a 1200 Euro price tag.
My girlfriend swore to me that she could find it for much less - perhaps 300 Euros, and the search began. We crossed the border into Switzerland, went to a large mall in Mendisio, and looked. Yes, the montone's sisters were there - some as beautiful as the one I had seen - but they started at 2000 Euros.
That was on Wednesday. I spent Thursday looking through Lugano but with no luck.
On Friday, my girlfriend and I searched through Milano. Nothing. We couldn't find a store here which even had one - at any price. My girlfriend told me that my tastes are simply too expensive, even for the fashion-conscious Milanese.
Hence, she insisted on finding me a substitute. In a large department store near the Duomo, we found a heavy, cloth, parka which will do the job well - but lacks the montone's incredible beauty (and sky-high price tag). My girlfriend bought it for me as a birthday present and I wore it as we walked out together.
There, in Piazza Duomo, a Gypsy beggar sat on the sidewalk holding her hand out for money.
At least she wasn't cold - she was dressed in a montone!
And, of course, traveling involves running into some con games.
My favorite was in the bazaar in Istanbul. I was offered a "genuine Rolex" for $35. I have to admit that it looked real - the only difference I could spot was that the magnifying glass in the crystal was not as powerful as on a real Rolex.
Even though I knew it to be a phony, I played along and asked if it was real.
"Yes," the vendor solemnly assured me. "It is from Switzerland."
I turned it over and saw a paper sticker on the back which said, "Made in China."
When I pointed that out, the vendor replied, "Of course. 'China' is the name of the town in Switzerland where they make the Rolexes."
I thought his answer was so wonderful that I bought two of them, one for myself and one for my daughter. (He reduced the price to $30 each.)
Mine actually ran well for about three years, but eventually the "gold" tarnished and the watch gave out.
In fact, about a year after I bought it I wore it on a trip to the States. The person sitting next to me kept staring at it and finally couldn't help himself from asking, "Excuse me, but if you can afford a Rolex, why do you fly Economy Class?"
"It's okay," I told him, "It's an Economy Class Rolex."
Learn more about this author, Josh Wilde.
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