by Erica T. Barton

Created on: January 21, 2008   Last Updated: March 24, 2008

Don't change your job...change your boss. With a few simple behavior modification techniques, you can change your hostile boss into a happy boss without him or her ever knowing. All it takes is finding the win-win situation.

When I was in college, my favorite assignment came from Psychology Class...Behavior Modification. The teacher explained that anyone could change anyone else's behavior without their knowledge. All you was needed was creativity and consistency. Since I had the boss from hell, I decided to make him my guinea pig. Sure enough, in just a few weeks, my boss became better behaved and our whole office environment improved. I simply applied the following techniques:

1. IDENTIFY THE BAD BEHAVIOR: Write down the behavior(s) you would like to modify. For my boss, I identified the following:

* He never stayed in his office.
* He constantly yelled.
* He continually bored people with hours of useless, non-work related chatter.

2. IDENTIFY THE DESIRED RESULT: What would your target's ideal behavior be? For my boss, I wanted him to:

* Stay in his office.
* Stop yelling.
* Stop his inane chatter.

3. DEDUCE THE MEANING BEHIND YOUR TARGET'S BEHAVIOR: In the case of my boss, his behavior meant:

* He disliked his office. It reflected neither his personality or his position. As a result, he felt disconnected and powerless.
* He believed yelling enforced compliance and loyalty. Compliance and loyalty meant people believed in him.
* He used inane chatter to reestablish the connection he lost with his employees from yelling.

4. USE POSITIVE REINFORCEMENTS: What rewards does your target desire?

* My boss wanted to feel comfortable and important in his office, so I got his approval to makeover his office. By just facing his desk toward the door, he was able to see the rest of the office giving him the feel of being in control. By adding pictures, plants, and a fish tank, he felt comfortable at his desk.
* My boss wanted agreement. Therefore, when my boss spoke normally, I would smile and nod at him. This simple action taught him that he could win my agreement without resorting to bullying.
* He wanted to feel that people valued what he had to say. Pretending interest in his monologues achieved that goal. However, after five minutes, I would excuse myself from his presence while assuring him of my swift return. A few minutes later, I would appear at his side again and ask him to continue, but he could never remember what he had been talking about, giving me

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