22 of 38

Write now Article Tools

When deciding whether or not to have children it's important to think about what your priorities are now and how they will change once you become responsible for another life. In the excitement of planning for a baby, you may have a clouded view on how life will change for you and your spouse.

In the beginning you'll want to talk about the perfect name for your baby. If it's a girl, you've decided, she'll be named after both of her grandmothers.

You'll move into discussions about who your child will look like. More than likely you'll both want your child to have some of your spouse's most favorable traits. For those with a brutally honest relationship, you may even bring up those traits that you hope your child doesn't inherit.

After you've covered the theme of a nursery and what college your child must attend, it's time to think about how this is going to affect you.

1) Do you require much sleep?

Sandy and Michael know about this first hand. "Every time one of my friends has a baby, they always complain about lack of sleep?" Sandy looks over at Michael and grins knowingly, "Remember how I would say that I didn't understand why they complained when we used to go out every night. We never got any sleep? Why is it such a problem now?"

As Sandy and Michael learned, when Elizabeth was born they no longer had a choice. They used to stay out too late knowing they'd only get five hours sleep, but they could make it up the next night. It's not like that with a baby.

"I wasn't sure I was going to live through those first few months," Michael confessed. "It wasn't the same as going out with our friends and then rushing home for a few hours sleep. This is interrupted sleep. It's like you start and stop all night long. Never quite reaching a deep restful place."

Sandy and Michael are not unlike many other new parents. Late night TV and dinner parties are no longer a priority. Getting home and sleeping when Elizabeth sleeps is at the top of their list. Without this sleep, they can't perform other needed responsibilities.

2) Are you Career driven?

This doesn't necessarily have to change. You can have a child and still push forward with your career, however, you're likely to shift your career from first or second place in your life to somewhere around third.

Adam and Felicia are both corporate attorney's at different firms in New York City. Before having a baby they planned for every possible situation. "I'd say that Adam and I are fairly intelligent people." Felicia explained to me

• 1
• 2
• next page >>

Add your voice

Know something about Potential parents: How parenthood changes priorities?
We want to hear your view. Write now!