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Moments that change your life

There are many moments in a persons life that brings change, but the most profound are the ones that place you at that point where if you could stop time and answer the question, "are you going to survive?" and the answer would be a resounding "NO." When that moment comes you can see your life in a quick moment, the things you have forgotten about are now before you. It seems like time is standing still, and things you regret now saying to a love one or something you wish you had done comes to your mind. However, the most important thing you think about is the question, "Am I ready to go into eternity, and face God?"

From the moment I volunteered for the Special Operations unit of the AC-130 gunship back in 1971, I knew that it was going to be very exciting and an extremely dangerous assignment. When I flew my first combat mission, and was in awe by the anti-aircraft rounds exploding all around the aircraft like Christmas rockets going off it had not dawned on me that those "Christmas rockets" where really meant to kill us. But, after a couple of close calls it dawned on this old mind that I could get killed or have to bail out over hostile territory, neither a very viable option.

With each mission the dissension, (anti-aircraft fire); kept getting worst and then the enemy started being supplied with the surface to air missiles like those that where used in North Viet Nam. When we where shot upon with these we had to go into very aggressive maneuvers to evade them, but we stayed on the target and finished the job. It was during this time that I realized that the term, "adrenaline high" was a real addiction by the combat troops. When the nights where slow and there no targets and no flak, we became tired and bored, and we could feel the cold, tiredness, and stress set in, but at the first sign of fire we where awake, excited, and ready for action.

Now to the night that changed the rest of my life. We had a target, some trucks we had located and where in the process of destroying, when the call was heard, "SAM SAM 6 o'clock," and the pilot made a very aggressive turn. While this was ensuing, I was just getting a four round clip of 40mm rounds in my hands. I was being thrown around the plane, and was holding on the rounds as if I was in love with them, knowing that if these rounds of ammunition got loose and hit on the firing pin the round would go off inside the aircraft, not a good option. In his desire not to be shot down, the pilot

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