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One thing that managers, especially new managers, need to understand is that there is quite a difference between "like" and "respect." While it is very important to earn the respect of the people that are on your team, they do not necessarily have to like you.

The key to success in any leadership position is to earn the trust and respect of the people you are responsible to lead. While you can gain a certain amount of respect by virtue of your position and title, that respect will be short lived if you fail to take the steps to continue to build on what has been given to you. While those steps do tend to foster good feelings among your employees, building friendships is not a requirement.

Earning respect from your team members is a byproduct of your caring about the well being of of the people you are responsible for. If your team starts to feel like you are only concerned about your own success, and not theirs, they will soon start looking at every decision you make with cynicism, and will some of them will stop making any extra efforts to help the team be successful. In order for them to consistently perform at their best abilities, they have to know that the decisions you make are good for the team and not just you.

Another key to earning respect is to show respect. As soon as a manger starts treating employees as underlings, or not as worthy of respect, the employees will respond in kind. If you treat them as valuable team members, and value their ideas and contributions, they will respond by returning your respect, and being more willing to listen to what you have to say.

Finally, your team must feel that you are genuine. If it is all just an act, they will be able to tell. People are generally not very tolerant of hypocrisy. Once they determine that you are not being genuine, any respect they may have give to you will quickly evaporate.

The key to being a successful manager is to have a team of people that will allow themselves to be managed. Sometimes being a manager requires making hard decisions that will not be popular with your team, but if they know that your decisions are based on what is best for the team, and not on selfish ambitions, they will respect your decisions. Do what is right for the team and they will respect you.

Learn more about this author, Jim Smoot.
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