by Joseph Whalen

Created on: January 18, 2008

Parenthood is one of the most wonderful things that an individual can partake in, however it is a responsibility not an option. As such, any man who fathers a child with another woman does not have the option to forgo his responsibilities as a father. To do so is simply shameful, though all too common in today's society.

Both the man and the woman do have a right to choose, as everyone does. However, it is when that right to choose should be exercised that determines whether or not you are entitled to choose. Before a child can be conceived and born, there are several choices that both parties are permitted to make. These choices determine if the child is conceived. Once you have made your choices to conceive a child, you choices are limited and take on a new focus. You now must decide what is best for the child, not what is best for you.

Choosing your partner is the first choice you get to make prior to conception. Before deciding to engage in sexual intercourse with someone, it is best to know that person enough to understand their basic moral fiber. To know whether the person wants to have children, and whether you want to have children as well, especially with the chosen person. Once you've selected your mate, you need to consciously decide to engage in sexual intercourse. During the course of this engagement you as the man decide whether or not to use a condom, or perhaps your partner insists. You also must determine if your partner is using any other type of contraceptive. If she is not, you have to make a choice of whether to engage in intercourse with this person.

Once you make your series of choices, if a child is conceived from the action you do not have the choice of whether or not to accept the child. The child is a direct result of the choices you made to that point. As cold as it is to refer to a child as a consequence of your actions, the bare fact of the matter is that it is exactly that. Through your choices, poor or otherwise, you chose to engage in an act that had a high degree of probability of conceiving a child. You then must accept the consequences of that act and provide for that child by being a parent.

Granted there is one final choice once the child is born and that would be to put the child up for adoption. While this is the ultimate expression of shirking ones responsibilities, there are circumstances in which this would clearly be the best option for the child. Ultimately that is what is important, the well being of the child. Though

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