by Vernon Huffman

Created on: January 18, 2008

It is perfectly natural for a young adult to push away from parents. Each of us who have survived that phase of life remember what it feels like. You don't stop loving them, but you want your own space to make your own decisions and find your own adventures. You should follow this natural urge, but first, make your own plans.

Ground yourself by reviewing your needs, beginning with the most basic. Air is still free, as is most water, but you're still going to have to work for food. Can you enjoy a simple, raw vegan diet, or do you require perfect, multi-course cuisine? Decide what your expectations are and determine how you will fulfill them.

For shelter, will you camp in the woods at the edge of town, purchase a luxury condo, or something in between? Do you understand the advantages of equity in real estate? If not, you may need to do some research before you move. Rental can get you through a rough spot, but it can become an expensive trap unless you have a better plan. Take time to write your plan down.

What else goes into your budget? Clothing, transportation, education, entertainment, investment, and savings are common line items in household budgets. What are your expectations and what compromises are you willing to make in order to be on your own? Thrift stores, bike co-ops, and do it yourself projects can save you money. Living thriftily will give you more control over your future.

If you plan to live within the economy of the dominant culture, you will need a source of income. Ideally, you will find a way to get paid for something you really enjoy doing. If you love scrubbing toilets or digging ditches in the rain, this will be easy for you. Otherwise, my advise is that you find the job and set aside enough to live on for a couple months before you move out.

You can save money by living with friends, at least theoretically. Of course, you don't want to be a burden on your friends, so please plan to be able to live independently and set aside the money you save through cooperation. Odds are fairly good your friends won't plan as carefully and will be a burden upon you. Oh, well, what are friends for?

Spend some time each day imagining how you will feel when you accomplish independence. Now that you realize how much goes into maintaining yourself, please take time to thank your parents for caring for you all your life. Prepare for the worst, but expect the best, as you take the leap of faith. Happy landings!

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