by Jennifer Searle

Created on: January 17, 2008

The children have just drifted off to sleep. You and your spouse have finished up nightly chores and are both ready to drop from your long day. The option between watching the nightly news on the television in your room, reading a book or magazine, or having sex with your spouse hang in front of you as you lay down. If the option of sex seems like yet another chore on your daily list and the idea of reading a chapter in your new book or watching the daily sports scores on the news is more exciting: Then you and your spouse's might be suffering from sex-rut syndrome.

This syndrome has not yet made it into the medical books, but it does appear to exist. So how do we cure this problem that plagues so many marriages? The obvious answer is communication, but talking about sex isn't always the cure to getting out of a rut. Here are few tips you and your spouse can use to spice up your humdrum sex life.

EXPLORE YOUR DREAMS

Day dreams are the place to explore what you might like to do with your spouse. Spend 15 minutes every day having a sexual fantasy. This exercise can be done anywhere, anytime and costs nothing. You don't have to fantasize about your spouse, it can be anyone. What you are looking for in your fantasies is what is being done, how it is being done, and how much you enjoy it. Write some of your fantasies down on paper, but this is for only you to read when you need inspiration in the bedroom.

ACT OUT A FANTASY

Our fantasies might be tame or they might be on the wild side. Either way, act them out with your spouse once a week or how ever often you and your spouse decide to have sex in your marriage. What do you need to act out your fantasy? Your partner's willingness to try something new, and any props or outfits you may want to use. Do you want to do some role playing? Maybe a fantasy is having a quickie in the middle of the afternoon on lunch break? Either way, you must inform your spouse of your fantasy desire that you wish to play out, otherwise they might be shocked to see you in a French maid out fit when they come to bed. Although surprising your spouse with an outfit or props might not be bad if your spouse isn't opposed to trying out something new, and the excitement of it might just add to the fire.

COOK A SEXY MEAL TOGETHER

Cooking together can be a form of foreplay to get the heat started. Chopping, frying, and feeding each other little bits of creamy, chewy, crunchy food can be quite titillating for the foreplay starved couple. My husband and

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