by Author Name Withheld 216

Created on: January 13, 2008   Last Updated: August 28, 2008

Flicker of Love

Our bodies dance together and we collapse onto the white, pillow-filled bed. He pulls me into him and our noses almost meet. Our fingers are tangled together while our eyes flaked with vanilla glitter never blink. The silence swells are breathing and I do not dare to look at his boyish face any longer. I peer outside the window where the tiny snowflakes begin to fall. Reaching for the blanket, I shiver as if I am cold, although his warmth is plentiful. I check the clock which now resembles an hourglass with white sand rushing to the bottom to settle forever. Soon, I will return to my fiance and the life I beg not to have right now. He breaks the silence and whispers "I love you." I feel the same but am reluctant to tell him because doing so will only make this affair more complicated. I make a promise to myself that after tonight I will never cheat again and will follow through with my commitment to my fiance. I glance at the clock.

As I lay on the bed gazing at my lover boy, I think how wonderful it would be to stay like this forever. He pleads with me to stay but I can only think of how devastating it would be to my family, friends, and even worse him if I were to end my current relationship. My parents adore my future husband and I do not want to disappoint them. I know their time and money sacrificed for my wedding are not something to disregard. My friends rave of his exceptional good looks, wealth, and charm. On paper he is everything a girl desires. I am a fool to let him go and will not do such a thing. I check the clock. There is only fifteen minutes left.

Our time together is fading and I feel a sudden pang in my stomach. I wonder if I will be able to move on and forget his haunting face. I can see in his eyes that he feels the same and is scared to lose me. The sharp pangs in my stomach are followed with an uncomfortable claustrophobia. I close my eyes and am taken to a flashback of the last time I felt liberated and content.

It is summer and outside the fiery, orange sun is defined against the sky before me as I tread along the pavement in deep thought. Maybe I will run until I reach the sun. I plan out my day, week, and goals I must achieve. My body is dressed in sweat and the undying cancers that plagued my mind are forgotten. With two miles behind me, I am mentally refreshed and prepared for the journey.

Perhaps my winning smile proclaims happiness to the seemingly slow cars. My eyes pour casual tears as my emotions are stolen

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