1 of 23

Write now Article Tools

My ten-year-old son is angry. He is heavily medicated and diagnosed with bipolar and ADHD but he still screams. He kicks. He fights. He bites his self and proclaims he's stupid over and over again. When he first came to me, less than a year ago, he was a lot worse off than he is now. He wouldn't sleep by his self. He wouldn't bathe his self. He was scared to go outside alone. He had issues far worse than I can describe. He blames the break up. He blames it on not seeing me. My son is angry and it is all my fault.

My son is the victim of a difficult break up. He was used as a pawn. He was hurt in the process. I can't stress enough the importance of both parents being involved in a child's life. The damage to the child isn't worth the kicks you get from hurting your ex. I wish I could turn back time and change things more with each passing day. Time can be our friend but it can also be an enemy.

I met my ex when I was nineteen. We were both alone. We liked the same music and drugs. We based the relationship on that and called it love. We were together a few months when I discovered I was pregnant. By the time I was six months pregnant, he had moved on to greener pastures. Our son was born he wasn't there. He called a few times over the years but I always told him we didn't need him. I really didn't, but it wasn't me that mattered. It should have been about my son.

Right after my son's third birthday, my ex showed up with paternity test in hand. The process didn't take long and after he was positive he was my son's father. He took me to court and fought me for custody. I continued my love affair with drugs. They were my comfort until I got surprised with a drug test. My ex won custody of my son and moved away. He called it payback. I fought it. I screamed, kicked, and acted like a jackass. In the end, I still didn't get my way.

It's amazing how much growing up can help someone. I didn't really realize it back then. I guess I was too stoned. I was too worried about having fun and partying. I thought feeding and bathing a child was enough. It really wasn't. I never forgot about my son, but I moved on. I got it together on the outside but deep inside, I was in pain. Out of the blue and almost five years after no contact, my ex called and invited me back into my son's life. He said that he was out of control and that he feared not seeing me any longer would cause him to get in bad trouble.

Things still don't seem real. It hasn't even been a year and my son is now living

• 1
• 2
• next page >>

Add your voice

Know something about After a divorce: Dealing with an angry child?
We want to hear your view. Write now!