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Emotions are not a simple commodity easily disposed of. In all likelihood, when you said "I do" it was because you were in love. That love is not easily surrendered in the event of a divorce.

I wish I had a snap shot of my facial expression the first time I saw my ex with another woman. Talk about mixed emotions. I was over trying to mend the relationship, and I was over him. At least I had made every attempt to convince myself I was.

Although I was well aware he was in a new relationship, I was still caught off guard by the feelings that came over me when I saw them together in public. They appeared to have what I strived so hard to achieve in our relationship. They appeared to have closeness.

I pretended I didn't see them that day. At least outwardly. My heart on the other hand was full of confusion. Inside, I was tied in knots. When I swallowed, it seemed like I was swallowing a pear. When I took a breath, it quivered. When I reflected again on what I had witnessed, I felt sentimental. It seemed those pressing feelings of love, suddenly outweighed the distaste I had since acquired for him.

Dealing with these emotions would prove to be quite challenging. But I did it and so can you.

THE EMOTIONS

Sentimental. Those tender breathless emotions now mixed with the "what if's". What if ... we had only talked more. What if ... I had tried harder. What if ... things had just stayed the way they were? What if?

The loop of "what if's", is what binds us to those relentless mixture of emotions that will have us grasping onto the past. Logically we know our relationship ended for good reason. Philosophically, we hold on to hope. Who wants to admit they've made an error in judgment?

Well, the judgment you're left to trust now, is the judgment you've made in opting for divorce. Have confidence in your decision. The data for what would deem a divorce necessary was sure to be in place when you chose to do so. I know it was for me.

My guess would be you opted for divorce because a large part of that marriage turned out to not mesh with who YOU are. Your values, your morals, and your ideas, wound up not being compatible with your now ex-spouses. Despite who brought the idea of divorce to the table, you both knew it was the most fitting settlement.

Are you doubting your decision? Doubt, as with most emotions stems from fear. Fear of being alone. Fear of being your own author and rewriting life as you knew it. Fear, quite simply put ... of the unknown.

Give into that bag of mixed

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