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ABSOLUTELY!

I am writing this from the eyes of a child that was adopted. I can`t say that I have ever not known that I was adopted. I grew up hearing my parents talk about how I was "special" and how they were happy to have been able to "pick me out". I can`t say that I always agreed with some of the terms they used to describe me like that but looking back I can tell it meant more to them than it did to me at the time. Don`t do the cheesy lines to make them feel better. Just show and tell them you love them. I think it`s important to know where you come from.

I can`t that I was the most confident kid growing up. I know that I did have times that I looked more on the bad side of things than the good. I do feel like I would have felt like the wind was knocked out of me if I had found out ten or fifteen years later. I say tell your child as they grow so they are use to it and it`s no big deal to them. If there is a special story of how you came to have them talk to them about it. That is what my parents did. I remember the one story we use to always laugh about. I have an older brother that was also adopted. They were on the way to get me and my granddads car ran out of gas. My brother got really upset that it was taking so long to get his lil sister.

I also get to see the joy my friend has with her daughter now. She has a special story of how she came to have the sweet lil girl. I remember the day they went to finalize the adoption. The girl was almost 7, so it had been a wait for my friend and her husband. I was had the young girl with me when they called to tell it all went well. I let the girl talk to her mom and get the news. She was old enough to understand she was now "Jane Doe". She went skipping off into the other room saying her name over and over. It was not a big shock for her like it would have been if the parents had waited till that moment to tell her. Since they had shared this with her all that time she was as happy about it as they were.

I think it is always important to have an open line with kids and parents. This is not the kind of news they want to hear down the line. At the same time if you have waited to tell them, now would be a good time. It needs to be thought out very well. Create a comfortable atmosphere for them {you are probably not going to be totally comfortable any way} and really talk to them from the heart. Don`t play it down and don`t be cheesy with them. I have learned that kids, at any age, are smarter than most people give them credit for. They can spot a con pretty easy most of the time.

Should you tell your child they are adopted? YES! I think today is a good day for it.

I guess my final thought, always be open and honest with your kids. If you do then they will respect you more. We want our kids to be honest with us so we need to give them the same respect.

Learn more about this author, Genie Bienicewicz.
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