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With financial problems being the number one cause of divorce, this question is an important issue. I honestly don't think you can look at sharing your finances in purely logical terms-what's in your heart has to be in the equation as well.

Issues such as trust and doing what's right for your spouse, not just yourself, come into play the moment you say, "I do." Personally, my husband and I took the pastor saying, "And now you are one," at the end of our wedding to mean something more than just a suggestion. We combined bank accounts within a week. We weren't perfect at it, but we figured it out.

What I think a lot of people fear is that as individuals, you get used to handling money your way. You're not as accountable to anyone else but yourself. When you combine two people with bad habits on one bank account, it can cause a mess. That's why you probably need to learn some things before you do it.

My husband and I attended a day-long auditorium-style class taught by the author and financial counselor Dave Ramsey and later took a 13-week course of similar material. There are similar resources everywhere in the country. It's just a matter of admitting to yourself that you need it, and nearly everyone does since finances are rarely taught in school.

There's also the thing with "your debt" and "your spouse's debt" become "our debt." You have to work together to clean messes up if you want to be a financially stable couple and later family. If you take this attitude that your spouse should clean up their own mess without any help, the problem likely won't get solved. It's in working together that you can get a lot more accomplished and hold each other accountable.

Another good thing to do to make combining everything work is to create a budget. This does not have to be anything overly-complicated or limiting. You just need to know on a monthly basis where your money is going. There's also nothing wrong with having "fun money" for each of you to spend for yourselves, but with a budget you know you're not accidentally spending money for the electric bill, etc.

As just a last parting piece of advice, all of this is not going to happen overnight and you're not going to do it perfectly. That's okay though as long as you keep trying. The result after thinking this way for 3 years for us is a stronger marriage and better finances than we had as individuals. I just want to encourage you that this is a good idea if both of you are willing to do it for each other. If you don't, I want to gently say that money may not be the real problem.

Learn more about this author, Patricia Gilliam.
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