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Because the average man needs 2,500 and average woman needs 2,000 calories daily, a 1,000-calorie diet should be declared necessary and prescribed only by a qualified physician. Unless the diet is for a pre-teen child or an adult who weighs less than 100 pounds, such a drastic cut in food consumption can be injurious to the dieter's health. Did anyone mention anorexia here?

Take a walk on any downtown street or join the line at your favorite scarf-till-you-barf friendly neighborhood buffet, and you'll see what's happening to the American figure. Overeating and under-exercising have become a way of life for too many of us. The facts are that at least half of us are overweight by 20 pounds, and as many as half of those in the fatty category are dangerously obese by 40 or more pounds.

Therefore, I must assume that any adults who need to go on a 1,000-calories a day diet are just plain fat. If they are listening to their doctors, they know they are adding extra risks of heart trouble, diabetes and other fat-related, life-shortening ailments. The simple task of losing weight is to eat just about half of what the so-called normal numbers of calories they usually eat. Voil! Now they are back to their slim, svelte, sexy selves. If it were that easy, all those phony miracle fat-reducing ads you see on TV and in the press won't be needed. Not that they ever do any good anyhow, except to fatten the bank accounts of the advertisers.

As previously instructed, before you start your drastic cut-back of calories, consult your doctor, explain your plans and get some advice and suggestions from him/her. Unless you have too little brains to go with your too big butt, don't get hooked by any of the commercial diet plans. Don't be fooled by those full-page Sunday supplements that show side-by-side, before-and-after photos of fatties on the left, and retouched thinnies in bikinis on the right. Forget the testimonies that, "I lost 80 ugly pounds and now my husband won't stop groping me."

Calorie count charts are available free everywhere, including on thousands of websites. You can also get charts from your physician, pharmacist and health-food store, including ones you can use as day-by-day diaries of your weight-loss progress. As if you didn't already know it, for those who are overweight, there are good calories and not-so-good calories. If you're serious about losing weight, the first step is to cut back on as many of the baddies as possible.

You should already know the no-no list:

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