by DJ Evans

Created on: January 02, 2008

There was no doubt about it. Six tests couldn't be wrong. We had only been trying for a month, and I was pregnant! My husband and I were elated and stunned. We went out and immediately bought a couple of sleepers and a "bouncinette" for our little bundle to slumber in. It was late, but I also had to rush right over to my Mom's house to show her and my step dad the new "stuff". My Mom was as excited as I was - this was to be her first grandchild. It was October 2002.

Valentine's Day, 2003: Exactly three years after my husband had proposed to me, we found out that our baby was going to be a daughter. Again, I had to rush right to Mom to tell her - she bounced up and down and screamed. Mom was giddy and so were wewe had already decided to name our daughter Hannah.

Passover 2003: In March, I was five months along and growing rapidly. I am only 5'2", so I was very pregnant, very fast. My husband and I went to my parents' house for
Passover dinner. I had been feeling my busy baby moving around for some time, but only recently had my husband also been able to feel her moving. On this special night, my Mom laid her hand on my belly and received a strong kick from her granddaughter.
April 2003: Mom was admitted to the hospital with pneumonia. She was only 50, but not in good health due to an auto-immune disease.

May 11, 2003: Mother's Day. Mom and I talked and shared like never before. Suddenly, I understood what loving a child was all about! Hannah was not even born yet and I knew I would love her until the end of my days. Mom was still in the hospital, in intensive care now, but was in very good spirits and looking forward to meeting Hannah in July. We talked about painting the town when she got out of the hospital.
A few days later Mom was put under anesthesia for a lung biopsy and never came out of it. Her lungs failed at an alarming rate and she was put on a respirator and kept in a drug-induced coma. I continued working full time throughout my pregnancy, trying to strike a balance between hospital visits and caring for my self and the changing needs of my pregnant body.

July 12, 2003: After 62 hours of natural labor, we learned that Hannah was not interested in conforming to convention! She was delivered via Cesarean-section by some very wonderful doctors while our nurse midwife stayed by our sides the whole time. She was so beautiful I cried when I met her. She was incredibly feisty then and now!

Mom passed away five days later after being taken off of life support. Although they never formally met, I have no doubt that she is watching after the little girl who looks so much like her, as well as her little brother who followed two years later. Losing Mom at the same time I brought my beautiful girl into the world made for one of the most bittersweet and poignant times I will ever know. I miss Mom every single day, but I know that in all the ways that matter, she is still with us.

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