Hatred. Ignorance. Violated.
By Michael Deyo

HIV? Wow, how important was it to me in the past? How important is it to me now? How important is it to you? Are we all doing enough to protect ourselves? Do we really take time to find out the facts? Is there more to it then just getting it? Where and how can one help give support to the cause?

HIV in the past was just something that was deadly, and sexually transmitted. Something that was on TV, News, and in school was discussed during safe sex lectures. HIV to me was like cancer; I knew about it and didn't have it. I had my ignorant thoughts towards the virus, and how I felt the government needed to deal with it. Philadelphia was released, and it was about one man that had issues but it was only one man. Just knew what it was, didn't have it, and never really second thought it.

October 2007 I was diagnosed with HIV. Talk about a wake up call. Thought that it might be time to get a HIV test since the last one I had was 5 years prior. Was seeing a new doctor, so I requested to be tested. It was the following Tuesday afternoon at work when I received the call. They requested that I came in as soon as possible, to go over my results. The urgency of the call right away let me know something was up. Why was it so important to get me in ASAP if I didn't have it? Well I kept creating possibilities in my head. Didn't have it... They were calling me in about something else... Maybe the test was incorrect? My world was collapsing, and my brain was not relaxing. Soon what if thoughts popped into my head. What if I am...? My parents, my boyfriend, my friends... How was I going to tell these people? How are they going to react? How was I going to react? The fifteen-minute ride to the doctors was like driving thru the hallway in the movie "The Shinning". I need to know, could not stand the feeling of not knowing and what if's rolling around in my head. The doctor informed me that I tested positive for the Human immunodeficiency virus (HIV). I couldn't breathe as first, wasn't sure what was going on. My emotions were locked, and no feelings were being felt. I couldn't even drive back to work but needed the time to try and clear my head. Got back into the office, and busted out crying. I broke down and couldn't help myself. Took the next day off, and went home. My life was over; I was never going to have a normal relationship. I had become one of those people, which I thought the

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