How to cope with a High-risk Pregnancy; You know, it's amazing the things we take for granted in life. Take myself for example: I thought when a person wanted to have a baby they had sex, got pregnant and nine months later ... a baby. Oh sure, I had heard of women (some I knew personally) having miscarraiges but it didn't really register. That is, until it happened to me. Twice. Two boys. I was not prepared for the devastation, pain, anguish and the emotional roller coaster I was about to encounter. Nothing in my life experience could have equipped me for this mind-boggling and heart breaking situation. I went in the hospital pregnant but came home alone, no baby but my body responding like I was. I was six months pregnant when my first son was prematurely born, he had tubes everywhere, it hurt me to see him like that, but he was not developed enough to survive. They put us in a private room and let me hold my son for the first and last time. As painful as it was I did my best to comfort him and love him for a few brief moments. My little angel died in my arms.

I was four months into my second prgnancy when my second son was still-born. Don't even know what happened. Having been through one miscarraige I was careful not to become too attached to the life growing inside me. During my follow-up visit after my first son, I was diagnosed with an incompetent cervix. Your cervix is like a seal for your womb closed up tight, when it is time for your baby to come he/she pushes the cervix open. My cervix is always slightly open, which means any slight pressure from a baby can have me going into premature labor long before time. Unless I have a procedure called a McDonald's Circlage (hope I spelled that right). They use a rubberband like object to squeeze my cervix closed, in the seventh month they take it off and let the body perform naturally. Well, I had this procedure with my second pregancy and he still came, they had to remove the band because the baby would not stop coming. He was already gone.

I became more determined to have a child, hear the words "momma", wear stretchmarks, lactate, go through labor and come home with a baby. This was my goal ... not to give up my dream of becoming a mother for real. I began a mental and spiritual journey that would create a welcoming environment for my next pregnancy. One thought kept entering my mind, "if you get pregnant with a girl, she'll be too stubborn (like you) to come before her time". For some strange reason, I believed that.

I became pregnant again. I knew from the moment of conception, I knew I was carrying a girl, and I knew she would not come before it was time. Of course, I am high-risk and had my second McDonald's Circlage (to keep the baby inside), did what the doctor told me too, for the most part. I am not supposed to work, but I couldn't afford to stay home. I am severly anemic, so I had to take extra iron. And the most important thing ... prayer, me and the doctor both. I removed all un-necessary stress and proceeded into the world of "happy pregnancy".

Nine months later I had a baby girl, she is 14 now, 6'2 1/2, playing basketball, getting good grades, boy crazy, computer savvy, working my last nerve, (teenager, you know) and incredibly beautiful ... inside and out. She's is spiritual too, thank God. I knew she would make it because I felt it from day one. Just because you are high-risk doesn't mean you have to give up your dream. Pray and believe and be blessed on your journey. Mother/Fatherhood awaits.

Learn more about this author, Sandra Laraine Coleman.
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