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Humor: Family memories

Worst Family Reunion Ever!

I'm sure we've all had our share of bad family reunions. I thought I'd tell you about mine.

The day started innocently enough. And well, I might add. Earlier in the year, my mom had just been told she was in remission from the cancer that was trying to claim her life. Ecstatic that she finally could kick the hospital habit for a while, she went in for one final check up. And fell and broke her hip. I'll save that story for another time, so long story short, my dad and I had just gotten her out of the nursing home. It had been rough on her to say the least, but she adored her family reunions. And there was no way she was going to miss this one.

After many discussions with my dad about whether or not we should caravan with the rest of the family members, I finally won. Bright and early Friday morning, we packed Mom and her wheelchair in the car and headed for my uncle's house to meet up with everybody else. We were determined that we would leave on time. Ten A.M. sharp. No exceptions!

I'm sure you can figure how that turned out. If not, let's just say that 11:30a found me and my Engineer Cousin removing the rear seat of the rented yes, rented 15 passenger van so we could put this insanely huge cooler back there instead. Having grown up with these people all our lives, we'd ceased to ask why when weird things were done. Like filling this cooler with four cans of soda and nothing else. We could've at least fit a small child in it, too. But she ran away. Oh well.

Slowly, but surely, the family trickled in and we were ready to leave by 12:15p. So much for our 10a departure. The bizarre thing, as we were pulling off from my uncle's, another aunt and uncle finally drove up and joined the three car procession. With everybody present, I just knew it was time to get on the highway. My mistake.

My uncle is beyond frugal. So we ended up driving across the city to fill up with cheap gas. Of course after this grueling 15 minute trek, people naturally had get out and stretch their legs. I really hoped that wouldn't be par for the course. We had at least a six hour drive ahead of us.

Finally, tanks have been filled, legs have been stretched and bladders are empty. We're ready to get on the highway. A mere two and half hours late. Sort of. We had one more stop to make. We had to go to my Mechanic Cousin's house to get his tools. Just in case. Like I said, we've learned not to ask.

Finally on our way, my Lawyer Cousin took the lead in the 15 passenger van.


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