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Sweaty palms? Check. Nervous fidgeting? Check. Nothing to talk about? Check.
Looks like a first date to me. We've all been there before. You find yourself staring at the attractive, yet equally nervous person sitting across from you, longing to know more about them but struggling with the gaps of silence that seem to hover in the air and last for hours on end (though in reality they're but mere seconds long). This problem comes with a simple solution. The easiest and quickest way to get someone to relax is to get them talking, and that means both of you. All you need to do is arm yourself with a witty repertoire of topics to get the blood flowing and the lips moving, as in talking, of course.
1. Current Events: Though it may seem a little bland at first, this topic shows that you've got brains, that you can watch the news or read the paper and actually understand what's going on. Just beware parading your political agenda or you may find yourself at a "table for one."
2. Families: Asking about your date's family life can provide a lot of insight into the kind of person they are. Maybe they'll start gushing about Christmases in their childhood, or maybe they'll start raging about competing with their twin sibling, or maybe they'll clam up and refuse to speak at all. The point is, the possibility of a 2nd date may become much more clearer (or that much more unlikely) once you've explored the subject.
3. TV & Movies: As millions of Americans watch TV every night, and the multi-billion dollar movie industry is bigger than ever, this is a topic for just about everyone. You can play it safe by asking about favorite TV shows or the last movie seen, or be a bit more adventurous by bringing up a hot actor/actress you have a crush on. This can also segue into a conversation about celebrities, their paychecks, and Hollywood in general who doesn't have a point of view on that?
4. Work: Sure, you are bound to bring up what you both do for a living, but why not go at it from a different viewpoint? Ask about what your date dreamed to be as a kid. Did it match up to what they are now? Where/when/why did things change? You'll not only find out more about who they are, but also about their motivations, ambitions, and goals, perfect for sizing up a potential partner.
5. Just for Fun: Hobbies are a great topic for a first date, so make sure you already have a list of yours. You don't want to be the person who stares blankly when asked what they do for fun. This is a good time to talk yourself up as well. If you play a sport, mention it; your date might want to play with you in the future. If you've been to a great place on vacation, share a picture or two. Take special note of what they share with you so you can bring it up later, as in a 2nd or 3rd date!
The key to a great first date is good conversation. Be honest and willing to share things about yourself, but don't be a conversation hog. Remember, the purpose of the date is to get to know the person, a completely impossible task if you never let them talk. Don't be afraid of a silent pause every now and then, but come prepared with topics should there be an extended lull in the conversation. Beware topics like politics, religion, or past significant others, which can make people uneasy right off the bat. Once you both find a good talking rhythm, it should be smooth sailing for the rest of the date, at least until the goodnight kiss!
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