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Communication Issues

How to tell if someone is lying to you

We have all been there, believing things that someone tells us to later find out they were lying to you. Once you have been lied to you, you may find yourself wondering if you can ever trust that person or others for that matter again. There are many ways to tell if someone is lying to you. of course in person it is much easer to detect whether someone is lying to you. Here are some tips in being able to tell a liar from one that is telling you the truth in person.

A liar is pretty easy to spot once you know what to look for. So here are ways to spot a liar...

* No eye contact! If the person talking to you does not look you in the eye when they are talking to you then that is a huge sign of betrayal. They may often look at you but not for long. Their eyes will wonder around the room and very seldom actually look at you in the eye.

* Talking faster then normal. Most likely they want to get the lie over with, so they tend to talk faster then normal.

* Standing or even sitting with their arms crossed. This is a protective sign and they may be doing it as to shield themselves from you since they are insecure and know they are lying to you.

* Signs of nervousness. If they are acting nervous and fidgety then it may be a sign that they are being deceptive.

* Picking a fight with you or trying to pass the blame. If the person is defensive and trying to change the subject by picking a fight with you or passing the blame on to you, it may be a sign of deception.

* Body language. Just watching their body movement is a great way to tell if they are being deceptive. Again if they acting nervous by folding their hands and moving around a lot, they are probably lying to you.

* Signs of stress. Since lying is stressful for the person there are signs that you can look for such as dilated pupils. Even a raise in their vocal pitch may be a determining factor that they are lying to you.

* Lack of details in their story. Often liars only think of the most obvious plots to their lie. So if they are lacking a lot of the story and you ask them and you get a response with a lot of pauses then it may be a sign that they are thinking it up as they go along.

When you are on the phone with someone it can be a little harder to tell if someone is lying to you. Using the guidelines from above such as the lack of details and the higher pitches in their voices, make sure you listen to them carefully. Make sure you listen for any inconsistencies in their story in person and on the phone. If their are things that simply do not go together,call them on it. Ask them all the questions that you have. Interrogating them is the easiest way to crack them. once they feel that you are on to them, they may end up breaking and telling you the truth.

You can ask them questions politely and try not to jump to any conclusions. Just try to get the facts in order from them. Many times if someone is lying and you ask them for a simple fact then they may pause and try to think something up. SO if there are plenty of pauses coming from them when they are talking you you, it may also be a sign of deception.

Listen to your intuition! Many times you have a gut feeling about something, well listen to it, Again do not jump to any conclusions, just simply ask questions nicely and see or listen to their response.

You can simply come out and ask the person if they are lying to you if you are brave enough to handle their reaction. Doing this they may be caught of guard and not know what to say. No matter what you do about the feelings of someone lying to you, do it is a tasteful fashion. DO not blow up and act crazy, simply talk to them and find out why they are lying to you.

Learn more about this author, N. A. Hernandez.
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