Embarrassing mommy moments occur in every mother's life. Unscheduled, unplanned, and definitely unforgettable, embarrassing mommy episodes seemed to occur regularly for me as I raised my four children.
My first and most embarrassing mommy meltdown moment came in Atlanta in June 1987. Driving to a family reunion alone with my 14 month old daughter, I had stopped off at a hotel for the evening. Needing some baby food, I pulled into the adjacent convenience store and walked in only to find the store packed with a bikers' club buying snacks. Clad in leathers, covered in tattoos, and sporting long ZZ Top style beards, these men definitely were not my daughter's image of "Daddy". As I sat her down to pay for my purchase, she stared with big eyes at the bikers. Reached up my legs for reassurance, she scooted her chubby hands under my shorts and pulled on the first thing that she made contact with which happened to be my "big girl" panties. Pulling them as hard as she could, I stared along with the bikers at white panties which at that moment seemed bigger than all the cotton crop of Georgia.
In the early 1990s, I was attempting to emulate Martha Stewart's every glue gun experience and making my family miserable in the process. Having watched her on TV as she demonstrated growing wheat grass in Easter baskets to make them the softest, coolest baskets ever, I decided that I had to rush out to the local feed and seed store to buy some wheat grass seed for my kids' baskets. Toting my two preschoolers and navigating my growing pregnant belly into the store, I waddled up to the counter and asked for a handful of seed. The clerks stared at me as if I had parked a space ship outside. After the transaction, I walked my brood to the store's front door and caught a glimpse of my reflection in the glass. There I stood, with six inch shoulder pads framing my quickly reddening face! Apparently, each of my fashionable shoulder pads had not made it into their respective positions.
Just looking a Martha's face or bikers on the highway still brings chuckles to our family!
Learn more about this author, Jan Vroegin.
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