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In retrospect it is much easier writing about the education of young children when one does not have young children. Take into account that most child raising today is not done alone but with a support system of grandparents, cousins, aunts and uncles and godparents.

But the key word here is support. In early childhood the most important educators are the parents. Even if both the father and mother work, what the child sees of either one of them is more significant or should be than any other instructions they will receive from others.

For one thing, hopefully, that while others come and go, the parents will have a consistent interest and part to play in their children's lives. Parents are there for the bad as well as the good. It is usually the parents who will run to the doctors, the parents who change the diapers, and the parents who spend the nights with the children, and ultimately, it is the parents who will carry the long-term responsibility of child raising.

Well-meaning friends and relatives often interfere with the instruction parents give to their children, and this confuses them.

I knew a woman who told me, "I had this very small child I was separated from during the day, because I had to put her in Day care while I worked, and I was worried about what would happen to her. Because I could not be there with her every minute of the day, and because children's memories and attention spans are short, I made a priority of safety, and her ability to protect herself. I did not bombard her with too many rules or explanations, because I felt she would be lost in them. I did make sure she knew, without a doubt, the difference between right and wrong, sometimes even with a slap on the wrist, or very strong remonstrations, so that when she was by herself, she would not hesitate or have to think too long about how to act in certain situations. I could not have her running into the street by herself and sometimes explanations would not really convey the danger, but making her afraid of getting disciplined would."

"Also," she continued, "when the child began to grow and I, myself, began to know the child, about what she knew, what she didn't understand, and how much she could remember and retain, my simple one sentence strong commands became more complex, less assertive, and more explanatory."

In other words, it is up to the parents in early childhood to build a base of knowledge. The first bit of knowledge should be regarding the child's safety, the next regarding manners, how to relate to other children and grownups and then, after that, it is possible to attack other spheres of behavior, tasks around the home and school, sharing, giving, and just learning about the world.

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