Never judge a car by how pretty it is. In the British Army there is a saying 'Bull*it baffles brains' Knock them out with a dazzle when they first look, and it will influence the whole inspection.

In the Army training camp, there are many room inspections. If you share the load of labour all around the room, it will ultimately bee a good, all round clean room. 'Hmm' the officer is thinking 'I'll bet there is dust up on that window pelmet'.Perhaps there is dust he'll find it, and the whole operation will be repeated that evening instead of relaxing.

The B baffles brains means make the first visual impact of the room be stunning. To the detriment of the rest of it. It is basic psychology. Guys who have made a floor sparkle like an explosion in a mirror factory must have done all of the room with such vigor and thoroughness. Mobile cell phones are sold on looks.The new Apple i phone is expensive, and not as advanced as other makes. They sold out of them on the first day in the UK because it looks great! Big screen, touch sensitive.

I have been in the car trade many hundreds of years. It sure feels that way anyway. I remember a very tidy, shiny Ford Fiesta. It was gleaming. Look underneath? Gleaming. The man wanted assurance of the car passing it's MOT test at my garage, knowing I would be objective and would pull no punches.

The lights were all OK, so I jacked up the ramp. I am always suspicious when I see fresh under-body sealer, as it's bitumen-like consistency can cover a multitude of sins. The perspective buyer thought it was a good thing. Under UK VOSA regulations, you are not allowed to poke screwdrivers through bodywork. However, you may use the small, plastic tapping hammer to listen to any noise, that might indicate rust or rot. A little like a dry-rotted timber. This didn't prove necessary though, as I spotted newsprint underneath. The vendor had repaired the metal floor with painted newspaper! The repair should have been a metal plate continuously welded all the way around. Most of the floor was missing. The steering ball joints were worn, an engine mounting had broken, the handbrake had seized, and hardly worked, the headlamps were misaligned, two tires had deep cuts, and one was worn below the legal limit.The buyer just saw what he thought was an excellent car. How happy he was to find out that he was being stiffed.

Selling cars is easy.Allow the buyer to look without you hanging over him.Let him discuss it in private with his wife, mate

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