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then a movie and finally my husband told me that I needed to get things into perspective. My guilt was my crutch. I used it for every reason to make myself feel as though my daughter needed me and only me. When the reality of it was, I needed her. She made me feel important. She made me feel needed and when I wasn't with her, I found some reason to feel guilty about it just so I could make my way home to her.

Eventually, I learned not to let the guilt eat at me and not to let it be my crutch to hold onto my daughter. I had taken things to an almost unbearably clingy level and that was definitely not healthy for both my daughter and myself. It took some time, but leaving her with people I trust has become a lot easier. Grant it, she still cries when she sees me walk out the door, but I know she gets over it, and so do I.

Guilt may be lurking around the corner for us stay at home moms, but it's there regardless of whether we're stay at home moms or not. What we need to remember is that, yes our kids need us, but we also need to realize that although we may feel bad for leaving them or we may want to beat ourselves over situations we cannot control, they need to learn things on their own and it doesn't help when we allow our guilt to overtake our conscience. We need to gain the upper hand and just tell our guilt to back off! Our children will love us no matter what, so guilt or no guilt, just remember, you're doing the best you can and that's always enough for your children.

Learn more about this author, A. Goltiao.
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