by Maxine Schleisner

Created on: December 08, 2007

I personally raised two children with A.D.H.D. and can tell you that it doesn't have anything to do with stranger danger.

Many years ago we played a game with our children that was very much fun for them and us. We played what if a stranger kidnapped us? What would you do? How would you get away? How would you let someone know you were being held against your will?

This started at about five and six years old. We talked about being taken by anyone including neighbors who you know to people you don't know. We would be riding in a car going somewhere and discuss what they would do if someone took them and put them in a trunk. They knew about kicking out a tail-light, to just pulling the plug out over and over to make it seem like the tail-light had a problem to pulling out both so maybe a police officer would pull the person over. We talked about finding something to pop out the lock and get out when the person pulled over for gas or stopped for a traffic light.

We tied our kids up, nothing without us in the room, but making them work together to get untied and escape. We talked about being placed in a room and how you would get out. What about a closet? We played these games for about two years and my children were very brave and safe and we knew it. They were told about the puppy ploy, or kitten ploy, and everything in between. We spoke about people who might want to touch them in places where they should not be touched.

These games I am sure saved my children from ever putting themselves in harms way and knowing they were in control no matter what situation they were in. I can remember times when they told me of people who tried to talk to them at the park. At the movie theater, and even at the store. They knew to keep walking or going into the store where they would be safe. They would call someone over like a cashier and tell the person that the stranger in the car or on foot was trying to speak to them and they didn't know them.

We were weird parents to most people but we were parents who wanted to make sure our kids knew what to do if something like this were to happen to them. We did the (if you are on your bike and they try to take you off it don't let go of the bike). We taught them to scream, if anyone tried to take them anywhere without their permission. We also told them we would never send anyone to pick them up they didn't know for any reason without them knowing well in advance. There are things you can teach a child when they are young and make it a game. You can explain it to them every time you see a missing child alert on television. You can explain when you watch a movie.

They watch movies now and are so funny because they understand the car breaks down and " Why would you go into the woods in the first place?" They would stay in the car. They would stay on the road. They would be careful even if someone stopped on the road to help them. These are adults now and still think about things that could happen. They see people who enter jobs with guns and tell us, wow mom, I sure wouldn't want that to happen to me but if it did I would dive under my desk and be very quiet. I would hope we taught our children well and hope they will always be safe but you can never tell. We can only hope we have gone over everything we could think of through the years and they are ready for almost any abduction scenario but maybe not. I just hope we did our best.

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