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Ah, Eric Cartman. If knew that I loved South Park, as well as knowing that I was into human rights and all for tolerance and equality and as Stan Marsh, said in the episode "Cartman Joins NAMBLA," "and all that gay stuff," and that bigotry is one of the things I truly hate, you would not believe me when I say that Eric Cartman is one of my favorite fictional characters. I love him. He's funny, he's completely insane, and he's an 9 year old little boy. Yes, he pretty much goes against all that I stand for (he's a bigot, plain and simple), but I love him. So, I'm going to go through a list of my favorite Eric Cartman moments.

Favorite Eric Cartman moment number 1. In the eleventh season of the show, in the Imaginationland trilogy. Cartman and Kyle, who are enemies (but I assume that reading this, you know this) and friends, have a bet that if Cartman can PROVE leprachauns exist, Kyle will suck his balls (I kid you not). Cartman does indeed prove it, and the next several episodes involve a fight to save Imaginationland, Cartman not caring at all what's going on there, Butters stuck in Imaginationland, and Stan and Kyle being questioned about it. Cartman basically does everything in his power to make sure that Kyle will uphold his part of the bargain. He even revives Kyle who had been killed by ManBearPig, from Al Gore's imagination. A very touching moment. In the end, our Kyle doesn't suck his balls, but rather Cartman imagines it while in Imaginationland.

Favorite Eric Cartman moment 2. In season ten of the show, there is an episode called Miss Teacher Bangs A Boy, where Cartman becomes a Hall Monitor and dresses up as Dog the Bounty Hunter, complete with his own song. Indeed, Cartman gets authority again, just like in the episode Chickenlover where he's a cop and yelling at people to "Respect my authoritah!" His shining moment in this episode is his crew, including Kyle who has joined because his brother has issues and he introduces Kyle as "Kyle, Jew."

Favorite Eric Cartman moment 3. In season 9 of the show, in the episode Marjorine. Butters has to go undercover as a girl to get a typical little girls future telling device. Cartman devises the whole plan. But my favorite moment is when he tells Butters who is about to go to a sleepover with little girls, that "If they [the girls] start lezzing out to roll with it"

Favorite Eric Cartman moment 4. In season eight of the show, there is an episode called "Cartman's Incredible Gift" where Cartman sustains a head injury (he tried to fly with cardboard wings and falls off his roof) and apparently gets psychic ability. So, for the whole of the episode, Cartman has a bandage around his head, dressed in a plaid robe, and walking with a cane and pretending to be a psychic detective. It's so funny and so classic, that I love it.

Favorite Eric Cartman moment 5. In season seven of the show, Cartman has a Christian Rock band, and is trying to sell 1 million copies of his album. The only problem is that all of these songs sound like he's physically in love with Jesus Christ. The lyrics make even me, a hardened South Park fan (been watching the show since I was 11, I am now 20 years old), uncomfortable.

There are millions of great Cartman moments. I wish I could talk about them all.

Learn more about this author, Ashley Benlove.
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